The Lazy Sovereign

Xu Tian sat cross-legged in the rogue's hidden chamber, staring at the glowing seal hovering above his palm. It shimmered with an aura of authority, its intricate design spinning slowly, casting faint celestial light over the room.

"I don't get it," Xu Tian muttered, poking the artifact. "You said I'm a Sovereign or something, but why do I feel like I've just been handed a giant headache?"

The voice of the Heavenly Bureaucracy Seal responded immediately, cool and authoritative:

"Sovereignty is a position of great honor. Your duties include balancing cosmic order, mediating disputes among celestial factions, and filing the appropriate forms for all divine interactions."

Xu Tian's eye twitched. "You're joking."

"Noncompliance will result in penalties."

"What kind of penalties?"

The seal hummed ominously. A second later, a small lightning bolt zapped Xu Tian's hand. He yelped, shaking it wildly.

"Fine! Fine! I'll cooperate!"

Before Xu Tian could complain further, a notification appeared in his mind—a glowing scroll covered in elegant celestial script. The seal's voice narrated:

"New Task: Mediate a dispute between two spirits residing in the Quiet Stream Village vicinity. Deadline: Immediate. Penalty for failure: Persistent itching."

Xu Tian gawked. "Spirits? In the village? I've lived here my whole life—there's no such thing!"

"Noncompliance will result in penalties."

Grumbling, Xu Tian stumbled out of the chamber and returned to the village. The seal's light faded as it merged with his body, leaving only a faint sigil glowing on his palm. He muttered to himself the entire way back, railing against his rotten luck.

Back in Quiet Stream Village, Xu Tian followed the seal's guidance (reluctantly, of course) to a pair of ancient oak trees near the village square. As he approached, faint whispers reached his ears.

"You dare encroach on my roots?" growled a deep voice.

"Your roots are strangling my river access!" snapped a high-pitched voice.

Xu Tian blinked as two faintly glowing figures emerged from the trees—a burly, bark-skinned spirit and a lithe, water-like entity.

"What's this?" the bark spirit boomed, glaring at Xu Tian. "A mortal dares to intrude on our sacred quarrel?"

The water spirit squinted. "Wait, is that… a Heavenly Seal? Hah! What kind of Sovereign looks this pathetic?"

Xu Tian sighed, raising a hand. "Alright, let's settle this quickly. I've got a nap to catch."

The spirits laid out their grievances, each accusing the other of overstepping their domain. Xu Tian listened halfheartedly, nodding along while sneaking glances at the sunlit patch of grass where he planned to sleep.

Eventually, he held up a hand. "I've got it. Simple solution: the tree spirit trims his roots a bit, and the water spirit stops flooding the area during the rainy season. Fair?"

The spirits looked at each other, then back at Xu Tian. "That… actually makes sense."

The seal glowed faintly, and the voice intoned: "Dispute resolved. Task complete. Rewards: One Tier 1 Cosmic Point."

Xu Tian froze. "Cosmic Point? What's that?"

The seal replied, "Points may be exchanged for various privileges, including cultivation resources and immunity from penalties."

Xu Tian's eyes lit up. "Wait… so if I do more of these tasks, I get stuff?"

"Affirmative."

Xu Tian grinned. "Looks like I've found my calling!"

Just as Xu Tian was basking in his newfound "job," a thunderous roar echoed from the forest. The rogue cultivator, still furious from his earlier defeat, had returned—with reinforcements.

Xu Tian groaned, slapping his forehead. "Why can't I just get one peaceful day?"