Reincarnation into the world of Naruto with the system

I lay on the training ground, completely drained… literally. To my absolute surprise, my strongest affinity turned out to be water. I was shocked. I figured it was because of Mokuton. But the fact remained. And the twins confirmed that they were the biggest sadists I had ever met!

I don't even remember which one of them suggested practicing jutsu in real combat. Fortunately, Itachi had left me a legacy of techniques for all elements, though his main focus was on fire… which, in my case, had only about 5% affinity, barely enough for a secondary element.

The plan was simple. First, I learned the jutsu. Then, those two sadists would throw their fire techniques at me, and I had to extinguish them. After all, water was stronger than fire in this matchup, and I had more chakra.

The problem was… there were two of them, they weaved hand signs much faster, and their chakra control was way higher! To put it bluntly, their control was positive!

Still, there were some benefits—my agility and speed were skyrocketing as I dodged their attacks. And I had a suspicion that soon I would develop resistance to the cold because my techniques kept breaking, dousing me in water, and leaving me to train in wet clothes under a chilly wind.

Now, I had finally sent those two home, telling them I needed a break. Honestly, all the other training sessions hadn't been too extreme… except for theirs. But combined, they set a bar that was just too high. I had been keeping up this pace for three months already… and the first month after the Uchiha twins joined in.

Tsume, by the way, also growled and wrinkled her nose at them appearing in the Inuzuka compound. But for some reason, she tolerated it. More and more, I was wondering what conditions had been set for her to take me in. No, having studied her personality a bit, the better question was: what kind of conditions forced her to make such major concessions?

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Kiba walking toward me, looking slightly less exhausted than I was… or just holding himself together better.

I didn't have time to get up and meet him—Tsume appeared next to me with a Shunshin… and Kiba abruptly changed direction.

"Are you done resting, my student?" she asked.

"Yeah… um… Sis Tsume." Now she was definitely going to knock me out, and I'd get some sleep! Bliss! Yep, I was definitely a masochist.

"Oh? And why 'Sis'?" she asked, narrowing one eye as if deciding where to hide my body. Hm, overdid it. Need to talk my way out.

"Well, I live in the Inuzuka compound, you train me, answer my questions, and guide me… that's more than what a sensei does. It's closer to family. But calling you 'Mom' wouldn't be right, and you're too young for that anyway. So, 'Sis' it is!"

Wow, +6% affection! Heh, all I had to do was sincerely tell her she was still young, and bam—instant bonus.

"Ahaha. Fine, have it your way. In private or around family, you can call me that. It's been a long time since anyone amused me like this." She nodded, still chuckling.

"Alright, rest up while I deal with my other student. Kiba, stop right there!"

Kiba, who had almost escaped, whimpered.

Huh. Now that I called Tsume my sister, what should I call him? Brother? No, Tsume was his mom, and I called her sister. Cousin? Doesn't sound right. Son?

A wave of pure killing intent washed over me from behind. Kiba, who was almost at me, facepalmed.

I take it I said that last part out loud again, huh?

The next moment, I blinked… and found myself staring at a familiar ceiling.

The hospital.

"Are you f*cking kidding me?!" Tsume wasn't holding back.

Great. I didn't remember what happened.

I wondered… after this, would she still be training me, or was I finally free to move back to my apartment?

A good question, but judging by the long list of debuffs in my status, I wouldn't be getting an answer anytime soon. Looks like I woke up too soon.

With nothing better to do, I decided to once again try recalling Kaguya's canonical abilities—to know what to expect for my main mission.

As always, the memories came with difficulty. This time, thanks to Ino's techniques, I managed to grasp some events… but the wrong ones. These were events after the battle with Kaguya and Sasuke. So, not useful. Because in this world, I wasn't Asura, and I needed to defeat Kaguya in a different way, in a different sense.

But something did stick in my mind.

Tsunade and Mei, who never found a partner. Anko, alone. Tenten, running a store in solitude. Kurenai, completely focused on raising her child, forgetting about personal happiness… and the list went on.

"Oh? Planning to seduce all of them under the excuse of 'helping the lonely'?" a certain orange-haired carpet finally spoke up. "Ha! Hypocrite!"

"Never even crossed my mind. Kurenai will be happy enough if I save Asuma. Anko… just needs a fellow pervert. Kakashi will do—no one cares about him. Tsunade is trickier, but helping Jiraiya and stopping him from dying should do the trick. Tenten—there are options. Neji, for one. Just beat the fate nonsense out of him, keep him alive during the Fourth War, and set them up. Heh, I'll have to play Cupid. But Mei… that's the tricky one. She never showed interest in anyone in the canon. And someone with her power and position… well, first, I need to actually meet her. If there's no spark, then I'll think of something else. But if there is…"

"Then you will betray me, my husband?"

Gliding—no, floating into the room with movements so mesmerizing they seemed unreal, Kaguya entered my hospital ward.

Eh?

And then I woke up.

Still in the hospital, but without Kaguya.

Phew. Just a dream.

My heart almost jumped out of my chest.

But I got the message—looks like I'll have to play Cupid. Once I clear up at least some of my own problems.

And yeah… I really needed to ask for a day off. All this overwork was making me hallucinate.

Still… compared to the "cheating husband vs. goddess wife" scenario, my last dream about Danzo-toilet suddenly seemed a lot less terrifying.