How to Survive as an Uchiha

As the conversation between Masashi and Fugaku deepened, Pakura's impression of Masashi began to change.

The Masashi she saw now was not the same as the one she had started to get used to—a somewhat unserious individual.

Instead, he now came across as a youth whose mind was filled with entirely earnest thoughts.

This serious version of Masashi made her feel a bit out of place. Though she hadn't known him for very long, their encounters had been eventful. Most importantly, he had been rather flippant throughout.

If not for witnessing his adept methods of fabricating fake reports to earn extra bonuses at the Hokage's office, she might have thought him unreliable.

After all, she had only acknowledged Masashi as a genius when it came to being a combat ninja. Political maneuvering was an entirely different matter.

Yet now, he seemed to have genuine ideas, though these ideas were so far-fetched that she found them utterly absurd.

"Kiri's political structure is shifting," Masashi continued, his hands folded in front of him. "The Mizukage has created opportunities."

"You suggest we abandon our homeland?"

"I suggest we secure our future. Even the strongest tree needs multiple roots." And some trees rot from the inside out, Masashi thought but didn't say.

To think of starting a new branch in Kiri—only he could conceive such a notion.

Among the Five Great Ninja Villages, Kiri was the most insular and xenophobic.

Of course, this was largely due to the policies of the Bloody Mist.

Pakura never expected Masashi to entertain such an idea, even if he had suggested it as a last resort.

This young man exhibited a rather pessimistic view of the Uchiha clan's future in Konoha.

Clearly, his proposal was not well received by Fugaku.

"Masashi, forming alliances is one thing, but the idea of splitting off is excessively pessimistic," he remarked. "The clan's circumstances have never been better. You're the main reason for that. You should have more confidence in us."

It's not that I don't have confidence in the clan. It's just that I don't trust you all... Masashi almost blurted this out.

But he held it back.

The Uchiha clan's obsession with the economic benefits of the Police Force was not a matter of greed. It was a path that entirely isolated them from Konoha's mainstream political environment.

Regardless of whether Tobirama created the Police Force as a deliberate trap for the Uchiha, the clan's current actions were effectively digging their own grave.

Given the Uchiha clan's strengths, the Police Force was ill-suited for them. Their true place should be in the regular military, in the jonin units.

Even from a purely economic perspective, the benefits of joining the mission system would far exceed what the Police Force could provide.

Of course, Masashi also understood that this wasn't something that could easily be criticized. Habits were among the most powerful forces in the world, and aversion to risk was natural. Most people's first instinct was to avoid risk.

But the problem was that the Uchiha clan still had this fixation on becoming Hokage...

Unless this obsession was resolved, the Uchiha would eventually find themselves in direct conflict with the Hokage's office again.

In his view, Kiri represented the best fallback option. Although Kiri's native ninja clans were exclusive, they were not opposed to the inclusion of strong outside clans.

The village's civilian ninja population was also growing in strength, and both the Third and Fourth Mizukage had come from non-clan backgrounds, which had put the existing ninja clans under considerable pressure.

Hopefully, the Uchiha's confidence wasn't just misplaced optimism.

Deciding not to dwell on the topic further, he focused on what he could do himself.

After concluding his discussion with Fugaku, during which he received an ample dose of motivational "chicken soup for the soul," he led Pakura out of Fugaku's residence as her guide.

He brought her to Obito's former residence and made thorough arrangements before leaving her to her own devices, entering his personal downtime.

In other words, he was off duty.

Back home, he tidied up a bit, enjoyed a well-earned rest, and, as night fell, stepped out to visit a comrade's house.

Reuniting with some old friends, the group decided to relax over tea.

It had been a long time since they last gathered.

It wasn't that tea was particularly appealing; it was simply the best way for them to unwind. Drinking and barbecues got boring after a while.

Masashi initially thought of inviting Shisui but was firmly rejected by his friends.

"Come on, Masashi-nii," Tetsuka earnestly pleaded. "When we hang out, we want to let loose. Shisui is way too uptight—it kills the vibe."

"It's like having an ANBU captain at a tea party," another friend added, drawing laughs from the group.

Masashi thought about it and realized they had a point.

The girls they invited were all incredible talents in their own right, and Shisui, as talented as he was, had this air of vigilance around him that made everyone uncomfortable.

This was especially awkward for the girls.

After all, their job was to entertain, not to cross any lines. The atmosphere was what mattered most.

Recalling the forlorn gaze of one girl from a previous gathering, Masashi agreed.

Thus, the group unanimously decided to head to a familiar bar.

It was the same street, the same owner, but this time there was no Danzō to ruin their fun.

The man was dead, after all. No chance of interference.

In honor of his former financial patron, he resolved to light incense for Danzō on the anniversary of his death next year. Maybe I'll even write him a poem about efficient budgeting, he thought.

When the owner saw Masashi, his eyes lit up.

This regular was someone of immense influence. A visit from him could make or break a business.

Soon enough, they were seated in the best private room, joined by the most talented dancers.

Drinking, cracking jokes, and occasionally singing, Masashi had the girls laughing and smiling, clearly enjoying themselves.

Watching the girls, who seemed ready to throw themselves at Masashi, Tetsuhuo and the others felt equal parts envy and admiration.

Unlike them, who only knew how to fight, he excelled not only in combat but also in other areas. His sculpting was renowned throughout the Land of Fire.

Just recently, nobles from the daimyō's court had paid a hefty sum to acquire his work.

Comparisons were indeed odious.

Masashi, however, couldn't care less about his friends' fleeting feelings of inferiority. He knew they'd soon be laughing it off as usual. He was here to enjoy himself, and enjoy himself he did.

Live for the moment, worry about tomorrow later—what else could one do?

---

The prison of the ANBU was, truthfully, not a great place.

It couldn't compare to the prison managed by the Uchiha clan in terms of facilities. Even the food at Konoha Prison was better than the standard meals in many ninja villages.

The cold concrete walls held none of the sophisticated security seals that lined the Uchiha facility, and the lighting flickered intermittently through the corridors.

This wasn't surprising—there just wasn't enough funding.

The Uchiha, being perfectionists, took prison management seriously. They couldn't stand doing things half-heartedly, and this meticulousness was reflected in their work.

Orochimaru, however, wasn't bothered by such details.

Left without parents when he was just a kid, he'd gone through every hardship you could think of.

Among the three Sannin, Tsunade loved gambling and drinking, while Jiraiya adored the company of women. Orochimaru, on the other hand, had no interest in life's pleasures.

Food, clothing, and shelter meant nothing to him.

His sole passion was researching ninjutsu—not to harm others, but to uncover the truths of the world.

One day, he would unravel all the mysteries of existence. That was his only goal, deeply rooted in his heart since childhood.

As a boy, his initial motivation for pursuing ninjutsu was a simple belief: if he unraveled the truths of the universe, he might reunite with his parents.

Ironically, it were Konoha ninjas who had killed his parents. Technically, Konoha was his enemy.

But Hiruzen, recognizing both his talent and the darkness in his heart, took him as a disciple. With fatherly care and guidance, along with the companionship of Tsunade and Jiraiya, Orochimaru's hatred gradually faded.

At the time, he truly saw them as his comrades.

However, the harsh realities of war exposed him to the fragility of life. To uncover the world's truths and shield himself from pain, he severed all ties and began seeking immortality—a prerequisite for his research into ninjutsu.

His ultimate goal required one essential thing: time. This was the only true currency in this world. Everything else was meaningless.

Without companions, all his energy was channeled into ninjutsu research.

Orochimaru despised conflict—it wasted his time. His dream was to find a place free from external distractions where he could research in peace.

But Konoha was becoming increasingly unsuitable for his work.

The constant power struggles between the Hokage's administration and the ninja clans consumed his energy and irritated him. It was a waste of life.

When Danzō nominated him for Hokage, he found the idea laughably dull. But he couldn't outright refuse; after all, his unrestricted research often relied on Danzō's support.

He tried to see the bright side, remembering the Second Hokage, who conducted experiments freely without interference. Orochimaru admired Tobirama not because he was Hokage, but because they would have shared much in common as researchers.

Ultimately, the position went to Minato, supported by the jonin corps. While a bit disgruntled, Orochimaru was relieved.

At least someone else could deal with the mess of being Hokage.

Yet the chaos persisted.

Danzō, despite his generosity with funding, was an insufferable nag. He frequently dragged Orochimaru out of his experiments for tedious meetings.

If Danzō hadn't been his benefactor, Orochimaru might have stabbed him with the Kusanagi long ago.

At that point, he resolved: anyone who partnered with him but wasted his time—benefactor or not—would be eliminated.

In the ANBU prison, where time seemed to stand still, he didn't feel confined. On the contrary, he appreciated the silence—it gave him space to think.

Although Minato's seals were still firmly in place, he wasn't concerned.

His snake-based ninjutsu, developed using Ryūchi Cave's Sage Techniques, altered his physiology in ways that made him nearly impossible to subdue.

Even without access to ninjutsu, he could easily overpower most people.

While the ANBU restricted all incoming information, they couldn't stop him from gathering intelligence. 

During his imprisonment, he remained fully aware of outside events.

Danzō was dead.

Though the old man had always schemed incessantly, Orochimaru was surprised by his sudden demise. Minato had acted decisively.

Orochimaru approved.

Not only had he gathered intelligence, but he had also plotted his escape route down to the last detail.

Recently, however, Orochimaru had scaled back his information-gathering efforts. He refrained from sending out his miniature snakes because Masashi had returned to the village. 

Still, he didn't see Masashi as an enemy. His escape would likely benefit the Uchiha clan.

Kumo, which suffered minimal losses in the last war, would undoubtedly seize the opportunity created by the collapse of the three Sannin.

War would divert Konoha's attention, leaving him free to act.

Additionally, war would allow the Uchiha to grow stronger, challenging Konoha's existing power structure. A military confrontation between Konoha and Kumo could also attract Iwa's attention.

The previous war had heavily damaged Konoha, Suna, and Kiri. Even as the victor, Konoha couldn't recover its strength quickly.

And losing Danzō meant it had even less capacity to project power externally.

Orochimaru had already decided: he would head to the Land of Rice Fields.

Its geography made it ideal, avoiding the conflict zones of the Great Nations. Its only strong neighbor, the Land of Fire, could be avoided if he stayed hidden.

He could establish a village there, gain recognition as Konoha's ally, and work in peace.

Everything was in place. It was time to act.

In the cell, faint footsteps echoed.

Orochimaru had already memorized the ANBU patrol intervals. By his calculation, he could escape unnoticed until reaching the northern district.

Once there, the western forest would provide cover, allowing him to scale the wall and escape into the open world.

Only a handful of people in Konoha could stop him now.

Outside his cell, an ANBU ninja glanced at him, sitting still with disheveled hair.

The masked figure hesitated, their gaze avoiding Orochimaru's piercing, snake-like eyes.

"Orochimaru," the ANBU said emotionlessly, "is there anything you need?"

"I could use a test subject. I have a new idea." Orochimaru's gaze sharpened, his greed unnerving the ANBU, who stiffened.

"You must be joking…" the ANBU muttered, quickly turning to leave.

The cell returned to silence.

The ANBU ninja's footsteps quickened. He turned a corner and came out from another place after a while.

Passing the security checkpoint, he left the prison area and returned to the office.

Another ANBU stood as he entered.

"Any changes with Orochimaru?"

"None," the first ANBU replied, though he looked shaken.

The second ANBU observed him but said nothing. Everyone knew that facing Orochimaru was unnerving.

Their squad leader entered, glancing at the pair.

"Ren, you've been to Orochimaru's cell?"

"Yes."

"Understood. Take the day off. You've earned it."

The shaken Ren nodded weakly, murmured a "Yes," and left. 

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119/100: First bonus chapter reached!

203/200: Second bonus chapter reached!

308/300: Third bonus chapter reached!

407/400: 4th bonus chapter reached!

520/500: 5th bonus chapter reached!

520/600 reached for next bonus chapter. I don't think we can reach it.

If we somehow reached the top 10, which is so unlikely: 3 chapters/day for 1 week.

[email protected]/Malphegor

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