True Magician (FatexDxD)

Emiya residence.

I had finished my fourth cup of coffee during the silence. Which did nothing to lower my headache and irritation level.

- Is our visit inconveniencing you, Mr. Romani? - Michael asked cautiously, seeing my irritation, which I didn't try to hide.

- Oh, my God. How could you think that? - I indignantly pressed my palm to my face - A humble man like me was visited by such distinguished and majestic guests as you. I am so filled with joy that I cannot contain my smile. Don't you see that?

The Heavenly Leader still kept a smile on his face, Gabriel looked at me incomprehensibly, and Griselda's eyebrow twitched.

What else did they expect after arriving here in person? Don't they realize that demons won't sit idly by when not one, but two archangels arrived in Kuo? I have no doubt that Sirzechs and Serafall are already tearing up at this news.

- Whose fault is this? - I heard Goetia in my head - I remember it was your decision to reveal yourself to the archangel, wasn't it, Romani? What's the saying? "You fight for what you fight for, you get what you get"?

- I didn't know that two archangels would show up here at once," I answered him, "And why am I justifying myself to you?

- Because you admit your stupidity? - he said with undisguised sneer.

- Dreaming is not a bad time-

I was about to contradict him when Michael interrupted my conversation with Goetia.

- I suppose our visit was unexpected," he said, "but we couldn't help but do it.

- Because of my humble personality, I take it?

- You yourself must realize that Solomon's personality is of great importance not only to Heaven, but to the entire Biblical faction," he began with admiration in his voice, "Even apart from his... special fascination with women, he was probably one of the greatest Saints in history. And the entire Council of Archangels considered him an extremely important person, since Father himself recognized him.

Hehe. At the mention of God, he became sad, and Gabriel's eyes began to water.

Yeah, yeah, God is dead... I wouldn't say that, though. His will still exists in the True Longinus, and if I wanted to, resurrecting him wouldn't be a problem. But would it be worth it? I don't know, I don't know.

- On that basis, we would like you to be part of the Church. And according to my sister, your personality is a replica of the original Solomon. Only with less attraction to women and a rougher personality.

- Rough? I'm telling it like it is, not mincing words. If someone's an asshole, they're an asshole. No buts or ifs. - I shrugged my shoulders - And I remember telling the Cardinal, that obscene nun and your sister, didn't I?

- I see. We'll... figure something out," he nodded.

Then there was silence in the room. Michael was thinking seriously about changing the structure of the Church. His eyes did not move, and his hand scratched his chin in thoughtfulness. Gabriel, on the other hand, looked at him with troubled eyes. And so did Griselda. I decided to bring him out of it, of course, because I didn't want to wait for him to think it over.

- Is that the only reason for your visit? - I leaned back on the couch - Because I don't think it is.

- You're right," he nodded, "There was a situation that you mentioned in a conversation with my sister a couple days ago.

- Оh? So the holy toothpicks were stolen after all? - I asked, rolling my eyes.

- "Toothpicks, Mr. Archaman?" - Griselda took the floor - I don't mean to be impertinent, but calling artifacts of this level 'toothpicks' is rather rude.

I grinned.

There's no other way to call these reforged Excaliburs. If you compare them to the Noble Phantasms, they're at most D rank. Explosion on every strike? That's a bit weak. Shape-shifting? Not bad, but only if the wielder is someone at the level of Emiya. Mind control? Magic resistance, hello.

And I could give some sort of a head start, given the circumstances of this world and the anti-demon properties of the swords, but their durability... I'm guessing they'd be more likely to shatter than the shield if they hit Rho Aias.

- Believe it or not, there's no other way to call these things.

- May I ask why? - Gabriel asked, tilting her head to the side.

Okay. Now we can find out what my local colleague was capable of. Though I doubt he'll be as powerful.

- Just for the record, do you know what Solomon's powers were? - I assumed a businesslike demeanor.

Michael took on a pensive look, as did Gabriel. And Griselda waited with genuine interest for an answer.

- Aside from the obvious power over demons? He was quite a powerful mage. - Scratching his chin Michael replied.

Well, now that they're here, I think Azazel would be a good addition to the conversation.

I snapped my fingers and a magic circle with Solomon's seal appeared underneath us all. A regular six-pointed star encased in a circle. Seeing this, Michael and Gabriel were not particularly wary, unlike Griselda. She was about to pull out the sword hanging at her side as the next moment we disappeared from Emiya's residence.

Oh, yeah. Did I mention there were already demons at the door of the house?

-0-

Azazel's house.

- Where are we? - she asked with concern in her voice as the lights went out, sword drawn. At the same time, the two archangels were examining the decorations of the room.

And it was quiet and eerie. Just like the last time I came here. Is Azazel playing hide and seek with Nightingale again?

SCREEP

Suddenly there was an eerie creak of a door, and we all turned slowly in its direction. Berserker walked through it with her scalpels clasped between her fingers with a calm step, and upon finding us with a glance, she stopped and lowered her hands, putting them away.

- Оh? Master? I thought intruders had broken in," she said and shifted her gaze to the others, "Who are these? Patients? Amputation or injection?

Michael had his perpetual smile on his face and Gabriel had a look of intense surprise on hers. Apparently her eyes told her who it was.

- Who in-" Griselda was about to ask a question when I interrupted her.

- It's all right, Berserker. - I raised my hand. I'm looking for Azazel.

- Azazel? - Michael asked.

- Is the brother here? - Gabriel added.

- This is his house after all. - I shrugged and turned toward Nightingale - I hope you didn't castrate him, Berserker. Can you take us to him?

- Sure," she nodded and led us somewhere, "Please behave yourselves. He's on sick leave.

- Is he sick?! - Archangel asked excitedly - What's wrong with him? Is his life in no danger?

- Unfortunately, yes. He has a severe alcohol addiction," Nightingale nodded, and stopped at one of the doors of the house, "He's behind that door. And please don't disturb the patient too much. Otherwise it may prolong his treatment time.

I nodded briefly and entered the room. And what my eyes saw can only be described as a horror movie.

There was only one single lamp burning in the room, which hung in the middle of the room. There were metal bars attached to the window and the walls resembled those in hospitals. In the room was a hospital bed, to which Azazel was handcuffed.

He was dressed in a straitjacket and his eyes were dead and resembled a dead fish. He didn't move or blink, he just... was. Azazel looked more like a corpse or a vegetable than a patient or a sick person. And only the heart monitor showing his pulse gave information that he was alive at all.

- Fuck..." I muttered, seeing all this.

Maybe I'd gone a little overboard. By some fraction of a percent, say. Because now I felt sorry for him. Turning toward the others present, I saw Michael's very concerned face and Griselda's nervous look. And Gabriel...

- Brother!" she shrieked and ran over to the bunk and started tugging on his shoulder, "How are you feeling! Are you alright!!!

Azazel slowly turned towards her voice and upon seeing Gabriel, his eyes widened so much that I was worried they were going to pop out of his eye sockets.

- S-sister..." he muttered in a weak voice, "S-save yourself... The d-devil is near... R-run...

And then he lost consciousness, apparently unable to believe his eyes.

- Brother! Brother!" Gabriel started yanking him from side to side, "Come to your senses!

- Mr. Archaman," Michael called to me cautiously, "What happened here? Why is Azazel in such a state? And who is this "Devil" he mentioned?

- I will only say that I am not to blame for this. Figuratively.

- Figuratively?! Why does the Governor General of the Fallen look like he survived the war?! And his psychological state is so unstable, judging from his behavior, that I think he's going to go insane! You-

- What's all the noise, dear visitors? - came the calm voice of Berserker, who entered the room like a ghost. I jumped, Griselda raised her sword, and Michael opened all twelve of his wings to defend himself. Gabriel tried to wake Azazel - Didn't I tell you not to disturb the patient?

And she was looking at us with eyes so scary that it made me want to pee. I did what anyone else in my position would have done.

- Fuck it! - I shouted and activated the teleportation circle, taking myself, Azazel, Michael, Gabriel, and Griselda back to the Emiya residence and knocking Nightingale out with 3rd magic.

Once home, I instantly created an entire liter kettle of coffee and drained it in a volley, trying to calm myself down.

Nurse of steel? More like Freddy Krueger in a skirt, for crying out loud!

Fuck this kind of adventure. Just fuck it. I won't make that mistake again. Never in my life. Uh-huh.

-0-

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