This DCverse is Maddening

Chapter 18: Chapter 17: Burgers and Blondes



The sun was just getting ready to set when the group had gotten off of the bus and entered into their normal stomping grounds. The slight strain of traveling around the city for hours on was evident through not just their faces but also posture. Just looking forward to getting a hot meal in their bellies and crashing into bed. All in all, everyone was feeling a bit hangry (hungry and angry).

Albert honestly began to miss the old pizza shop he lived down the street from in his old life, they sold cheap slice but were incredibly cheesy and delicious. Just thinking of the mouth burning piece of heaven made his mouth begin to water. His stomach growling didn't help any in this situation, but he had firm up his resolve.

'I could talk to them now?'

But he quickly amended his plans when he saw exactly how tired and on edge everyone was.

'It wouldn't do to add more to their plates for now, I'll bring up the issue next time we meet.'

He had to admit defeat in the face of collective fatigue and hunger.

The day had eventful though, they had collected a lot of clues not mentioned anywhere from their previous findings. Especially the part of why this case wasn't investigated further and deemed a suicide. And hopefully, tomorrow will the last time they needed to go searching in archives for information. Which Albert was sure Angeline was grateful for.

'She'll probably have to do this more often if they decide to keep on working with ghosts and their grievances…'

But he decided not to burst her bubble, not wanting to call upon the wrath of the blonde anytime soon.

"Do you guys want to get something to eat?" Michael asked, patting his stomach loudly," I'm starving, my treat."

"W-what about that burger joint we went to last time?"

Steve suggested.

"Ew no," Angeline immediately shot down," Their burgers are way to greasy."

"T-that's the point…"

The adolescent grumped.

"Anyway," The blonde ignored his rebuke," I say we go to that Italian place?"

"When I said it's my treat," The large teen blanched," That doesn't mean empty my wallet.."

"What?" She asked innocently," I don't know you mean.."

"How about that sandwich shop? The one that sell them at a ridiculous size?"

Marceline added, visibly drooling at the thought of them.

"T-that's because they're p-primarily just bread loafs with b-bits of meat inside."

Steve snorted.

"What about some pizza?"

Albert decided to try and cut in on their discussion, only somewhat certain he was included in their discussion..right?

"Nah," Angeline shook her head," The only good pizza shop is located near the docks, it's too dangerous to go there this late. Plus they close pretty early in the day anyway."

'Damn, Gotham truly is a shit hole. No late night pizza around here I guess..'

"Well since no one has no idea where to go," Michael said grinning ear to ear," I guess I'll be the tie breaker."

"Fine." The short haired girl shrugged," But at-least pick somewhere good."

"Don't worry, I will…" The youngster paused in anticipation," Let's go to a burger shop."

"YES! In y-your face Lin!"

Steve exclaimed, sporting his superiority over the suddenly sulking blonde.

"What a minute," Michael interrupted before anything more could be said," We're going to somewhere different. My sister brought some food back from here."

"Well lead the way big guy."

Marceline said, gesturing for him to take the lead in this little adventure.

*******************************************************************************

Albert had finally found love. True, pure love that he hadn't experienced in either lifetimes. Anything he experienced then could never come close to this divine experience. Thin patties of ground meat cooked to a crispy finish, deep fried onion rings, crunchy lettuce, juicy tomatoes, strips of bacon, a single slice of American cheese and all topped with a sweet brioche bun.

With his first bite, flavor exploded out from every inch. Every single crumb and bit of juice. None of it escaped his mouth.

Throughout the frenzy, it was like his mind had turned off and his body had fully taken over. In a flash, the divine food had disappeared down his gullet without any evidence to speak of. Automatically, a cold can appeared in his hand and it too got drained of its divinely sparkling liquid.

There he just leaned back and luxuriated in the comfortable malaise of an excellent meal. Took in the soft sizzling noise of meat being pressed into delicious goodness. Those hands expertly working metal spatulas on a pipping hot griddle.

"What.." Angeline groaned, her very being exuding a feeling of absolute peace," What was that?"

"That my friend, is what people call heaven."

Michael said, also just taking in the atmosphere.

"You know," The blonde sighed," If this wasn't so good, I would be getting on you for being blasphemous. I'll let it go for now."

"I t-think your god will u-understand.." Steve joked," That chef must have the hands of god…"

"That's going to far Steve," Angeline halfheartedly glared across the table," When this fades, I'll get you for that…"

"I d-don't care…" He said," I can d-die happy after that.."

"Don't worry," Marceline added in," After Lin kills you, I'll listen to your grievances and eat another burger for you.."

"T-thanks.. that'll be appreciated.."

"I might order another to go…" The large teen murmured," My sister will actually kill me if she finds out I went here and didn't get her anything.."

"S-safe bet.."

"Oooh look at the kiddies!" A high pitch voice squealed in delight," Looks like you got yourself some more regulars uh?"

Albert peaked out from heavily lidded eyes and spotted a scarily familiar woman leaning back on one of the bar stools. Even in casual wear and not clothed in her iconic black and red outfit, she stood out in his memories like a lighthouse for those lost in sea.

The woman had incredibly pale skin, almost pearl like in fact. Blonde hair messily tied up in a loose ponytail with the ends dyed in long faded red and blue colors. Her baggy wear hid a lot of the toned and athletic body beneath that he knew she had gained from regularly tangling with human monsters like Batman. Strangely colored red combat boot completely threw off her faded sweatpants and jacket. And on her frankly incredibly beautiful face, bright blue eyes looked on the group with evident amusement. Her plump lips curled into a wide grin, exposing white teeth.

It took every bit of restraint not to just bolt out of the shop in that moment. The calm and peaceful atmosphere the good meal had put him into completely gone. Seeing as she wasn't in her iconic costume, he could safely conclude that this shop wouldn't be included in any schemes today. Hopefully.

Albert decided to wait her out and closed his eyes again, no longer trusting himself not to either ogle the woman. Just wishing that she would do what needed to be done and go without starting something.

He tried his best to get back into the state like the others, but the appearance of such a dangerous woman had completely shook him out of his mood. And now his brain was firing off so many signals that it was slowly becoming a problem.

"Order up!" The sound of the cook placing a paper bag on the metal counter entered his ears, a feeling of relief starting to flow through his body.

"Oh?" She said coyly," It's pretty cold outside, so I might eat this in here…"

That made his body stiffen up like a board, he definitely wouldn't be able to stay calm if she decided to stay here.

'Just leave lady!' He internally shouted,'Please? I don't want my face smashed in tonight..'

"Nevermind!" She cheered," Red will kill me if I keep her waiting for too long! Bye bye, see you folks next time!"

The sound of her heavy boots clomping across the room and the bell over the door ringing indicated her departure to his ears. Causing his body to release the pent up tension inside.

Looking around, he felt a bit envious at the groups relaxed countenance. Ignorance truly was bliss. And he truly cursed his curios side for not simply minding its own business.

"Are you guys ready to go?"

Albert asked, prodding at their almost comatose bodies.

"Wha?"

Angeline said wearily.

"Oh yeah.." Michael yawned," It's getting late, you guys can stay at my house for the night."

"T-thanks.." Steve stretched," I w-was going to ask a-anyway.."

"Let me just call my mom first," The blonde said," Shouldn't be a problem though."

"I'll follow behind all of you." Marceline added.

"Well thank you Michael for the meal," Albert groaned while getting up," It was quite the treat indeed."

"Don't worry about it," He waved away the thanks," Thanks for picking up the slack earlier today. We were kinda freaked out but you got us back on track so we're kindof even. Do you want to take a milkshake with you?"

"Nah I'm way too full to even think off adding more. Have a good night everyone."

"You too."

"G-good night Albert."

"G'night."

"See you later."

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Her heavy footsteps could be heard as she hummed and stomped her way up old stairs. She ignored the occasional thumps and yelling from nearby people.

"Shut the hell up lady!"

"I gotta get up in the morning!"

"I'm gonna complain to the landlord!"

Their cries of dismay were like a music too her ears. Its why she did it every time she came back. The later the better in her opinion.

Soon, the blonde came across a familiar run down apartment door and without any hesitation kicked it open.

"RED!" She exclaimed cheerily," I'm bac-"

"Harley," Her red headed friend said tiredly," You have a key, use it.."

"But where's the fun in that?!"

Harley then leaped over and onto the couch, clutching the greasy brown paper bag tightly to her chest. Much her friends' consternation.

Pamela Isley, or better known as Poison Ivy, was a woman with an hour glass frame. Red hair that billowed wildly behind her which contracted greatly with her forest green skin. Her eyes were equally as peculiar as the rest of her. Green scleroses combined with green irises made her look more….monstrous? In-human? Whatever you would caller, no one could ever call her hideous.

Even Harley felt a bit insecure when she looked at her friend's naturally sensual frame, especially when she wore those black booty shorts that exposed her jade green legs and white crop top showcasing that fla-

"Well?"

Ivy quirked her eyebrow at the blondes actions, curled up around a greasy paper bag without a care in the world.

"Oh yeah!" She rummaged around in the bag for a bit before wiping the small coffee table clear of everything and emptying the bag right there.

"Gee thanks…" The red head sighed in defeat," I definitely didn't need that remote or anything…"

"No problem!" Harley chirped, purposely missing her friends sarcastic tone.

Ivy quickly snatched away one of the tightly packed bundles before the blonde could 'accidentally' eat it...again. She leaned over the coffee table and dug into the bits of heaven they could get from this hell hole of a city.

"Ish sho goood"

"Don't talk with your mouth full."

"Okay"

The blonde mumbled with her full. Pamela has known this firecracker for years now and only recent could she withstand her wild antics. She wouldn't ever admit it, but she did enjoy Harley's company. Most people only came to her when they needed something, but not the woman lounging across from her. It wasn't difficult to say that she was one of her only friends. Especially in recent times. Hell, she hadn't heard from Selina in months now.

"What's wrong?"

The red head asked, after noticing how vocal her friend was being. She knew the blonde loved that burger joint but never to this extent.

"I think someone recognized me.."

Harley grinned, pausing in her eating.

"Wha? Who?"

She asked cautiously, nearby plants twitching in turn with her darkening mood.

"No one involved on our side of the street," The firecracker tried to put her protective jade friend at ease," Just some kid."

"Oh," She slumped her shoulders in relief. Even though she knew there would be very little the average person could do to the gymnast in front of her, she still didn't want her to go through that. No reason to make it easier for the Joker to get claws back into the blonde. "What happened?"

"Nothing much," She shrugged," I was just watching these cuties experience heaven when I noticed one of them recognized me. It was kind-of cute to watch him sweat."

"Anything else?"

Ivy started to get a bad feeling after seeing the widening grin on Harley's face.

"Yep," She said, popping the p," I decided to follow him. You know just to make sure."

"Sure, sure."

"To cut the story short, I found out where he lives!"

She actually had the nerve to look proud at the moment almost causing the jade skin woman to facepalm at her actions.

"I feel like I have to ask," She sighed, knowing full well that she wouldn't hear the end of it if she didn't do so," Where?"

"That homeless shelter, you know the one ran by that old crone!"

Harley exclaimed.

"And what do you plan to do?"

"I don't know," She shrugged," I might mess with him a bit if I'm in the area!"

"Why?"

Ivy asked.

"Cuz it'll be fun!" Harley chimed.

"Anyway…" The green skinned bombshell decided to atleast to try and distract her," Have you heard anything from Selina?"

"Nope!" The blonde pouted," I tried to find her at the usual spots but nothing!"

"Same here.." Ivy mumbled," I hope she's okay wherever she is."

"Oh!" A sultry voice said," If I knew my absence caused such concern I would've dropped by sooner."

"What is it with you people," Ivy slightly snarled," I have a door.."

A nearby window slammed fully open and in came another rather beautiful woman. She had a slender frame, body more streamlined for speed and stealth than either of the two. Short brown hair tucked under a black beanie showcasing her sharp features. Emphasizing her sparkling green eyes that looked on in amusement.

"Where's your Kitty suit?"

Harley asked, not even questioning the woman's need for dramatic entrances.

"Its.." Selina paused momentarily," Out of commission for right now."

"So what's up?

Ivy asked turning her full attention back to her meal. The catlike woman only slipped effortlessly onto a nearby seat and picked a piece of meat off at random. Much to the blonde's consternation.

"I've been around," She shrugged," You know how it goes."

"She got herself a billionaire boyfriend!" Harley giggled," I saw some photos in the mags!"

"Really?" Ivy quirked her eyebrow at the slender woman," What's the story there?"

"Simple," She slouched further into the old lump couch," I met him while working and we hit it off."

"Is that why you've been so quite these last few months?"

"Yep!" She nodded," He takes up a lot of my free time.."

"Must be so hard," Ivy rolled her eyes.

"Does he have a tiny dick?!" Harley blurted, no longer willing to hold back," I heard that many billionaires have little weewees!"

"No," Selina smirked.

"Are you sure?" She didn't look convinced," You're not just saying that right?"

"Let's leave her sex life alone," Ivy decided to atleast try to regulate the flow of the conversation while she was still eating," So why did you come here?"

"Can't I stop by to see some friends?"

The thief smiled innocently, only receiving incredulous looks from not just Ivy but also the blonde who stopped mid bite. Slumping her shoulder in defeat, she allowed the stress to flow off of her. Making it seem as though she hadn't slept in days. The bags under her eyes deepened and worry lines etched themselves across her forehead.

"What's wrong?"

Harley, getting closer and taking her hand in hand. The concern was evident in her features, and Ivy noticed how the blonde subconsciously mirrored the posture of Selina, she knew her friend would be an excellent therapist.

'If only…'

"Something big is going to happen.." The brunette sighed," I noticed how some of my contacts have been quite lately so I go to the bottom of it. I worried at first that they sold me out, how I wish it was that simple.."

"They skipped town." She said, her words carrying a tangible weight to them," All of them. Only one of them had the decency to leave me anything and it told me that there is going to be some big moves coming into fruition within the coming month. I don't know exactly when or what but I thought it would be prudent to warn the two of you. Stay out of it. Don't let anyone drag you into any of this. Gotham is going to descend into chaos soon enough.."

After that pronouncement, they just sat in silence. With Harley gently stroking the distraught thief and Ivy just starting blankly into the distance. Their meal no longer bringing them any amount of joy in that moment.

"Who do you think is spearheading this?"

The green skinned woman asked, already having a few possible candidates in mind.

"I don't know." Selina murmured, fully holding the blonde close to her," I just know whoever it is was terrifying enough to have my people flee."

"What are you going to do?"

Harley mumbled.

"I might go to the Bahamas.." She smiled tightly," I heard it's nice this time of year."

"So you're saying we should leave the city?"

Ivy hedged, ideas already spinning in her head. She could disappear into the sewers no problem. Or just submerge herself into the dirt and come out only after the dust has settled.

'But that doesn't account for Harley..'

She looked at the blonde woman being cradled and sighed in defeat. She couldn't abandon her. She wouldn't.

"Yes." Selina said," Take an extended vacation, go to a national park anywhere. But not here. Whoever is behind this definitely won't allow you two to roam free.."

"But I can't leave," Harley whispered in defeat," Puddin…"

Ivy wanted to scream in rage. That man had ruined her friend's life and will eventually lead to her death! She had to sit back and watch her friend get manipulate and abused for years! She had hoped with that thing being gone for so long, it would leave Harley time to heal and wrench herself out of his control. But it seemed she had underestimated the Joker here. If only she could wring that bastard neck and be done with it. She knew there wouldn't be any legal repercussions if she made it look like an accident.. But she knew the psychologist w

It took her a few moments to calm down and not lash out at her. Pamela knew she couldn't help it and wouldn't make it easier for her to relapse. Seeing the tightening grip Selina had on the blonde, she wasn't alone in her concern.

"Harley," Ivy started," We can't stay here. Everyone knows where we live. I have some safe houses we can bunker down in."

"Thanks Red, Kitty. I'm sorry.."

She curled up closer to the slender woman and silently wept in the suddenly cold, dark room. Completely bereft of any good cheer a good meal and friends could bring.


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