The Lord Just Wants to Have Fun

As Philip grinned slyly, an idea popped into his head, and he turned to Hans.

“How’s the work on engraving prayers to Eldir onto the stocks of the muskets and the grips of the pistols coming along?”

“The chief carpenter and his apprentices worked through the night and finished it, my lord,” Hans reported.

With the blacksmiths already overloaded with work, carving gunstocks had recently been delegated to the carpentry workshop.

“But that guy kept grumbling, saying he’s not a blacksmith, so why should he be engraving prayers to Eldir?”

“But he still did it, didn’t he?”

“Hahaha, my lord ordered it. What choice did he have?”

‘That’s right, orders are orders.’

Even in Earth’s armies and corporations, people followed commands without question. In a feudal society like Laterran, defying a superior’s command was out of the question.

“But why did you suddenly want prayers engraved on over 120 muskets?”

“To ensure Eldir’s blessing protects the soldiers, of course.”

Philip feigned seriousness, claiming that the prayers would boost morale and increase their chances of dodging arrows and projectiles.

‘The truth is, I just need more points.’

Philip had burned through all his points during the territorial battle, using them to craft Bigyeokjincheoro.

And with Eldir being busy in the Celestial Realm, divine missions had become scarce. So, Philip had to scrape together points however he could.

“Oh, and have them engrave the handles of the hand fans as well.”

“What? But those handles are too small for inscriptions.”

“Then at least carve Eldir’s Flaming Hammer emblem on them!”

“…Understood.”

The carpentry workshop would probably groan in protest, but since it wasn’t Hans’s problem, he nodded obediently.

With that settled, Philip returned to his ship design work.

******

The next day, while enjoying a cup of coffee, Philip received a series of messages from Eldir.

[You have engraved the Flaming Hammer emblem on the hand fans. Eldir grants you 3 points.]
[You have engraved prayers onto the muskets. Eldir grants you 10 points.]
[You have engraved prayers and the Flaming Hammer emblem onto Zippo lighters. Eldir grants you 13 points.]

‘Kukuku, excellent. They’re working hard.’

Seeing his points steadily accumulate, Philip smirked in satisfaction.

At that moment, Jude arrived.

“My lord, I am here to see you.”

“You traveled all the way from the royal capital—you must still be exhausted. You should rest a bit longer.”

“I have rested enough. Besides, Helen told me how busy you are.”

Jude had already guessed this upon hearing that Philip won the territorial war.

After all, the aftermath of war is always more hectic than the war itself.

More work meant more responsibilities, but this also meant an opportunity to prove himself to his new lord.

Philip nodded, pleased.

“Good. I was planning to assess your capabilities by assigning you to the administrative survey of our newly annexed lands.”

“We’ll need to carefully assess farmland area, population, and regional specialties.”

“Exactly. Among those, which do you think is the most urgent?”

Jude answered without hesitation.

“The population count, of course. If we don’t have an accurate census, we won’t be able to properly handle labor assignments, conscription, or tax collection.”

“As expected from a Socra College graduate. That’s precisely why I wanted to prioritize the census… Do you think you can complete it in 15 days?”

At this, Philip’s vassals murmured in disbelief.

“Wait, isn’t that a two-month job?”

“Exactly! Even the great Viscount Robert would take over a month to do it!”

Conducting a census wasn’t as simple as just counting heads.

People often hid family members to avoid taxes or forced labor, meaning each household had to be visited in person for verification.

To get an accurate count, multiple records needed to be cross-checked and verified.

‘But I don’t have the time for that.’

With so many other pressing matters, Philip didn’t want to waste manpower and resources on an unnecessarily lengthy population survey.

That’s why he wanted to test Jude’s abilities.

As a top graduate of Socra College with a sharp mind, he might have a way to complete it much faster.

Jude confidently declared, “Leave it to me. I’ll have it done in a week—no, less than that.”

Philip raised an eyebrow at the bold claim.

“Can you really finish it in a week?”

Even completing it in fifteen days would be impressive, but cutting that time in half?

Jude, however, took it a step further.

“If I have the right personnel, I can finish it even faster.”

“…And what do you mean by ‘the right personnel’?”

“I need at least five people—but they must be literate enough to write names and competent enough to count.”

Philip thought for a moment, then nodded.

“I’ll assign you five messengers from the territory’s military.”

Since messengers were responsible for reporting enemy numbers and logistical details, they were at least literate and numerate.

“Since you’ve boasted so much, don’t disappoint me.”

“No need to worry, my lord. You should start thinking about my reward—preferably a 20-year-old bottle of wine.”

With that, Jude left confidently.

******

Word of Jude’s bold claim spread quickly through the territory.

“Is he just full of hot air?”

“Does he think he can show off just because he graduated from Socra College?”

“Even Viscount Robert couldn’t do it this fast—he’s bound to be kicked out soon.”

Most people assumed Jude was either arrogant or a fraud.

And then…

Three days later.

“Lord Philip, Jude is slacking off,” Treasurer Buchini reported with clear discontent.

“Slacking off?”

“Yes! Instead of going out to conduct the survey, he’s letting the messengers do all the work while he just reads books and goes on walks!”

At a time like this, he should be working hard—not goofing off!

Even the other administrative officials were growing increasingly irritated.

“His companions are all working hard, but he’s just loafing around… We can’t let this slide!”

“That’s right! Expel him immediately!”

Philip shook his head at the uproar.

“He promised to finish in a week. It’s only been three days.”

No matter how he worked, they could judge him after seeing the results.

Hearing Philip’s decision, the administrators begrudgingly backed down.

“Hmph… Jude is still the same, I see.”

Philip turned to Helen, puzzled.

“What do you mean?”

“He was like this back at Socra College. Even though he always seemed like he was slacking off, he never failed to get his work done—and he still graduated as the top student.”

“…Is that so?”

Maybe Jude had a hidden strategy after all.

Two days later—

Jude came to Philip with a report in hand.

“My lord, the census for the five villages has been completed.”

“…Already?”

Philip’s expression hardened as he examined the report.

It contained detailed population statistics for all five villages.

“Did you just guess the numbers and write them down?”

Jude shrugged, unfazed.

“My lord, why would I submit a false report when it would be easily disproven?”

“…So it’s legitimate? Then tell me—how did you finish so quickly? Justify it to me.”

Jude smirked and began explaining.

“In every village, there are two establishments that always exist—the mill and the bakery.”

Philip listened carefully.

The staple food of the Laterran continent was grains like wheat, barley, and oats.

Since these grains had tough husks, people ground them into flour to bake bread or cook porridge.

That meant mills were essential.

“And bakeries?” Philip asked.

“Bakeries exist everywhere, whether in rural villages or cities. It’s more fuel-efficient and safer to bake bread in large communal ovens rather than individual households doing it separately.”

“That’s true. And baking bread isn’t easy—not everyone can do it.”

“Precisely. So, I used these facts to estimate the population with high accuracy.”

Residents might lie to administrators, but they couldn’t deceive millers or bakers.

After all, both flour and bread had to be ordered in quantities that matched the actual household size—otherwise, they’d run out of food.

Unlike on Earth, there weren’t many alternative staple foods available.

“So the millers and bakers would know the population best?”

“Yes, my lord. Literate ones kept written records, and even the illiterate ones relied on memory.”

“That makes sense. If they miscalculated, the villagers would riot.”

Thus, Jude dispatched the messengers to question millers and bakers across the villages. By analyzing their monthly grain and bread consumption, he was able to accurately estimate the population.

“Damn! Who would’ve thought of this method?!”

“Are all Socra College graduates this smart?”

“No way. He’s just an exception.”

The vassals marveled at Jude’s ingenuity, while Philip nodded to himself.

‘So that’s why he was so confident.’

However, a question lingered in his mind.

“With talent like yours, you could have worked for your father’s family. Why didn’t you?”

Talented individuals rarely went unnoticed.

Even illegitimate children of noble families were sometimes given minor administrative roles if they proved capable.

Jude’s expression darkened slightly.

“For a short time, I did work for my father’s family.”

“Did you learn a lot?”

“Oh, I learned plenty… but none of it was worth using.”

Jude didn’t go into detail, but Philip understood immediately.

Tax evasion. Money laundering. Bribery.

Most likely, corrupt dealings were all he was taught.

“I left before I got dragged into the filth.”

Corruption was always exposed eventually.

When that happened, the powerful cut off loose ends to save themselves.

Jude had no intention of becoming a disposable pawn.

“Did they let you go so easily? A top graduate of Socra College isn’t something a noble house discards lightly.”

“There’s always a way.”

Jude smirked.

To escape, he had deliberately become a disgrace.

He pretended to be lazy.
He indulged in alcohol.
He caused drunken disturbances, claiming to be a marquis’s son.

As he had expected, no noble tolerated a wasteful bastard—before long, he was kicked out.

“I want to work here for a long time, my lord. Despite being a frontier land, it’s vibrant, and the people are kind.”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

Philip was pleased.

He had just found a perfect workhorse.

‘You want to work here for a long time? Good. I’ll work you to the bone.’

A grin spread across Philip’s face as he spoke.

“I’ll inform the warehouse keeper—you may take any wine you like.”

“Haha! Thank you, my lord.”

“And soon, I’ll assign you an official position—so rest well until then.”

‘Because once you start, you won’t get to rest again.’

Jude, unaware of Philip’s true intentions, bowed respectfully and left.

But just as he reached the door, Philip called out.

“Wait. I have one more question…”