PTSD Military Chaplain of the Academy

“Um… Before we begin the entrance ceremony of Caldera Imperial Academy, I would like to express my gratitude to all the distinguished guests who have graced this occasion. First…”

The long speech of the Academy’s Dean, who was completely bald, began. Chloe listened intently with bright, sparkling eyes and a racing heart.

“Chloe. Why are you listening so hard?”

“Well, he is the Dean, after all. You should listen too, instead of zoning out.”

“What can I listen to if he’s just rambling on…?”

“Hey! What kind of words are you using about the Dean…!”

Elin, who was sitting next to her, shrugged and said.

“But it’s true, isn’t it? Look around. Everyone is dozing off.”

“Ugh…”

Chloe looked shocked. It wasn’t surprising since everyone there seemed to turn into pigeons, nodding off and pecking at the air.

“When will this end…?”

“Elin. Look over there! Over there!”

“Hmm?”

Chloe called Elin while tapping her shoulder. Elin, with half-closed eyes, shifted her gaze according to Chloe’s finger.

“It’s the lady of the Adelhaid family!”

“Wow. That person is entering the Academy? Isn’t she a year younger than us?”

“She’s been rumored to be a genius for a while now. As expected of someone from the war-hero Adelhaid family…”

“…Adelhaid is indeed impressive.”

The Adelhaid Ducal House. A noble family that achieved great merit during the last great war and took the lead in post-war recovery.

Chloe, who had once received support from the Adelhaid family, now looked at her as if she were a goddess. Elin shook her head as if she had no other option.

“Wow… She is so beautiful. I want to talk to her at least once…”

“…Hmm?”

Thanks to Chloe, Elin had woken up. While looking around the auditorium, she spotted a peculiar person.

A man whose eyes looked hollow and, for some reason, seemed exhausted. His sunken eyes were staring blankly into space, and his black hair looked messy despite being roughly arranged.

However, due to the glasses perched on his nose, even his unkempt hair seemed to carry an intellectual vibe, almost oozing a sense of decadence.

“First, I should ask for his name. Excuse me, may I ask your name?”

“Look at that guy. Chloe.”

“…Huh?”

Elin poked Chloe in the side to get her attention. Chloe finally turned her gaze.

Chloe stared quietly at the direction Elin was pointing. There was…

“…No one there?”

“Huh? No, what?”

“Are you playing with me? Just wait and see…!”

“No, what the…”

Elin glared at the spot where the man had been sitting. But he was already gone.

“The Dean has finished speaking.”

The man didn’t appear again until the Dean’s speech was over.

* * * * *

Swoosh—

Water gushed out violently. I stared blankly at the scene.

Seeing the waterfall-like stream made me feel like the chaotic thoughts in my head were being washed away. So I continued to watch it.

“Where did I leave the medicine?”

Now that I think about it, I came here to take medicine. Right.

After rummaging through my pockets, I finally managed to find the medicine bag.

Gulp.

“Phew…”

The drug, which had some narcotic properties, was a definite help to my mentally unstable state. There really is no substitute for this medication.

What? Bathing in holy water? Talking to the diocesan bishop? Going to church for confession?

“Pfft…”

After the great war, the absurd advice people close to me had given while I roamed around.

What nonsense. If that could cure me, I wouldn’t have any wishes left. I didn’t want to survive relying on such things either.

In particular, the words of the old priest who solemnly told me to confess were the most ridiculous.

While I was rolling around as a chaplain on the battlefield, that old man had been holed up in the church, preaching nonsense and collecting tithes. He called me a murderer, saying I killed people. He kept forcing me to confess whenever he had the chance.

“Damn that old man.”

I gritted my teeth. My head was beginning to feel hazy. That was the effect of the drug still lingering.

“…Damn, old man.”

The cold stream of water continued to flow, and before long, it filled the sink. Without hesitation, I plunged my face into the cold water.

Dipping my face into the cold water felt like my head was clearing up. I opened my eyes underwater. I could see the sink’s drain plug. A round drain plug.

Something caught my ear. From beyond that drain, I heard a muffled sound, as if something was rumbling. The dull sound echoed underwater.

I listened carefully. It was hard to hear underwater, but I concentrated on that faint sound as much as I could.

– Save me…

– We’re all dead! We’re all dead souls!

– Shoot! I said shoot!

– It’s an enemy assault! The enemy is coming! Repair the trench!

– Bang! Rat-tat-tat!

– Why did you survive?

Swish!

“Gah! Hah…! Gah…!”

Damn. It feels like the effect of the drug is slowly wearing off. I took another pill from the medicine bag.

“Hah… Phew… Damn it…”

This dose still lasted quite a while. Probably because my body couldn’t easily adjust to it, which meant it was a strong drug. But soon, I would have to look for another medication.

…I’m bored. In that moment, I unconsciously thought that.

No, no. I can’t give up here. I had a promise. Until I fulfill it, I cannot die.

I wiped my face roughly with a handkerchief. The tips of my hair were damp. I tried to dry it as much as I could.

I didn’t want to see my hair ends curling up like a pig’s tail. Maybe once this entrance ceremony ends, I should get a haircut.

– …Now, then. To the new entrants of the 89th Academy. I sincerely congratulate you on your enrollment.

The sound of thunderous applause reached me even here. It seemed the Dean’s speech had come to an end. Now it was time to introduce the new faculty members.

Would I be able to stand in front of so many students?

“…Let’s give it a try.”

I have to give it a try. Probably. I wasn’t sure.

I shook my head vigorously, trying to clear the fog caused by the medication. Yet I still felt restless, so I had no choice but to recite a blessing.

Finally, I exited the restroom.

* * * * *

“This year, with many applicants applying to our Academy, we had a lot of difficulty in selecting new professors. There were truly talented individuals, and the competition was fierce.”

The Academy Dean pointed in my direction and energetically continued speaking. The area around where I was sitting was filled with the new professors appointed at the Academy.

Some had been selected to fill vacancies left by existing faculty, while others were tasked with newly established subjects.

I was among the former. I was assigned to the position of Professor of Theology, which had become vacant.

I never expected to be chosen; it was a stroke of luck. Perhaps the Academy regarded my experience in the war positively. I wonder if there is someone at the Academy who also participated in the great war?

“I am truly sorry to those wonderful applicants who could not be chosen… But! I can confidently say that this new faculty has outstanding skills and abilities, and I, Damian Lindberg, Dean of the Academy, stand by that!”

If I had the chance, I would want to ask that person. How do they endure this pain? Do they withstand it while taking this damn medication? If so, do they at least have some recommended medicine?

“I introduce you! First, Professor Esther Garrett, who will be in charge of the Department of Illusory Magic!”

Ah. I can’t do this. The sound of the Dean’s microphone echoed in my head, making my stomach churn. I felt my fingertips going cold.

“Calm down. Let’s take it easy. Stay calm… Phew…”

“Yes! Thank you! I believe you will teach our Academy’s students well. Next up…! This is the newly established subject! Professor Alfred, in charge of the Department of Close Combat Techniques!”

I managed to calm down a bit. The urge to smash that damned microphone was strong, but I was able to endure it just enough.

The people sitting next to me were decreasing one by one. Suddenly realizing this, a really bad thought crossed my mind.

This felt like sending off my comrades who had been beside me one by one…

“No.”

That was the effect of the drug. I endured the nausea and cleared my mind.

Bad thoughts dispersed. Like dark clouds dissipating after the rain. I took a slow breath.

“…Sir? Professor?”

Someone tapped my back gently. When I nervously turned around, a student who appeared to be from the student council flinched and looked at me.

“Is there something wrong?”

“Ah, it seems… it’s your turn to go on, Professor.”

“…Ah.”

Looking around, the seats that had been densely filled next to me were now completely empty. I forced a wry smile, thanked the student, and stood up.

“Phew… Alright. Let’s do this.”

Now that I’ve come this far, I have no choice but to get it done.

“Now… I would like to introduce Professor Antorelli from the Department of Theology!”

Clap, clap, clap—.

The applause seemed to have weakened a bit. I moved my feet, trying to maintain a positive mindset.

* * * * *

Tap, tap.

Sharp footsteps echoed across the podium. The eyes of the students who saw the owner of those footsteps filled with tension.

“Why does he look so pale? Is he unwell?”

“He looks a bit scary…”

“He doesn’t seem to be in a good state…”

The sharp footsteps cut through the quiet auditorium and soon stopped at the center of the podium. Silence fell again.

The man standing on the spacious podium surveyed the students. Countless gazes from the students turned toward him. Even the professors and the Dean on stage focused their eyes on the man.

After a brief silence, the man finally spoke.

“I am Lucio Antorelli, the head priest in charge of the theology subject starting this semester. I am also serving as the head priest of the Seminary Main Chapel. Since theology is a mandatory subject, I ask all students attending my class to do their best.”

It was a typical introduction. Yet his voice was laced with gloom, making it feel depressing to those listening.

“That person… is a priest?”

“He’s quite unique.”

“Did something bad happen to him?”

As the murmurs began to grow, Dean Damian quickly grabbed the microphone to continue the introduction.

“Father Antorelli will be taking over the theology department in place of the former Professor Helena. Now, please give a big round of applause!”

Clap, clap, clap—!

Thanks to Dean Damian’s enthusiastic conclusion, the applause sounded more lively than before. The applause gradually grew, filling the auditorium.

Yet, amidst that thunderous applause, Father Antorelli could not smile.

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