My Perfect Apocalyptic Life

The fruit shop wasn’t too close or too far from the Kechuang Building. With Meng Xu’s strength, he effortlessly dragged a cart loaded with several boxes of fruit and returned the same way.

There were still many zombies around, so Meng Xu kept a low profile, taking the safer route he had used before.

Li Xiang led the way, and any zombies that dared to block their path were swiftly slapped and killed by him. As a mutant zombie, Li Xiang was quite formidable, unmatched by any other zombies.

Meng Xu felt a twinge of regret.

If only that high-level talent—a bodyguard—had been under his command from the beginning, it would have been perfect.

Soon, Meng Xu returned to the Kechuang Building and saw that Chi Wei had dragged the water back, albeit in a scattered manner. He sighed and said, “Chi Wei, since your team didn’t complete the task last time, continue clearing the zombies on the second and third floors.”

Though zombies worked slowly, they at least kept working.

Chi Wei wasn’t particularly capable, but at least ordinary zombies wouldn’t actively attack her. She didn’t need to kill them—just lure them out and lead them far enough away.

Slowly but surely, let them exhaust themselves.

As for Li Xiang…

Meng Xu calmly instructed, “Li Xiang, stay at the stairs on the third floor. If any zombie doesn’t follow the designated route, kill them!”

Before, when I made promises, I was timid and hesitant. Now, when I make promises, I strike with full force!

Every three days? I can do it thirty times a day!

Annoyed? Then no evolution crystal for you.

Meng Xu found that the evolution crystal was truly useful like the carrot dangled in front of a mule.

It gives them hope; whether they can actually eat it depends on whether they can get a second one.

“Seems like I need to hunt some mutant zombies. One evolution crystal is too little; having two would give me more confidence.”

Meng Xu thought silently while heading upstairs, planning to call on the others to come down and move the fruits.

Those grapes and strawberries needed to be eaten quickly, or they would spoil easily.

They needed to be dealt with swiftly.

“Boss, you’re back!”

As soon as Meng Xu reached the fourth floor, Shen Zhaozhao eagerly approached him, cheerfully saying, “We’ve finished frying the 200 portions of chicken cutlets you asked for. To keep them warm, we even kept pouring hot oil over them.”

The idea of pouring hot oil was Zhang Lunping’s.

However since Shen Zhaozhao was the team leader, Zhang Lunping demonstrated his workplace savvy by crediting her with the idea.

As a newcomer to the workplace, Shen Zhaozhao wasn’t very experienced. She was both reporting their work and seeking praise, saying, “Zhang-ge, Zhou-jie, little Qiqi, and I all worked together on this. Zhang-ge came up with the idea. Boss, isn’t our department capable?”

She then proudly puffed out her chest, revealing her flat figure, her eyes full of expectation, as if to say, ‘Praise us.’

“Not bad, very good.”

Meng Xu reluctantly praised Shen Zhaozhao.

At that moment, Meng Xu heard Zhang Lunping cough twice, and Shen Zhaozhao immediately remembered something. Her expression turned sorrowful, “Chairman Meng, we heard about the death of our good colleague Zhang Tao from the First Division. We are deeply saddened… This is a small token from our team; we hope Zhang Tao will like it.”

After speaking, little Zhang Wenqi timidly stepped forward, offering seven origami cranes.

Seeing this, Meng Xu was taken aback for a moment, then smiled, “Zhang Tao will certainly feel appreciated. I also avenged him while I was downstairs and even recruited a new employee. I’ve assigned him to the security department as a ‘dog’; he won’t be coming upstairs.”

Meng Xu was pleased.

Seeing employees getting along harmoniously was indeed wonderful.

At that moment, Zhou Yanni glanced at Zhang Lunping, giving him a subtle look that seemed to say, ‘You did great.’

Zhang Lunping was quite at ease.

He felt he hadn’t done much, merely blended into the environment. People thought Chairman Meng was crazy, which was absurd!

Chairman Meng was just ahead of his time. As long as you followed his logic, you could not go wrong.

“Since you all put in much effort, let’s do this.”

Meng Xu took a deep breath and said to them, “Downstairs, there are water resources and fruits. Go down and move them up. Li Xiang will be watching over you, so don’t worry, he won’t attack you. As for your origami cranes, when we bury Zhang Tao, I’ll make sure to convey your thoughts to him, so he can thank you in your dreams.”

Dream visitation? Better not…

Shen Zhaozhao shuddered at the thought of Zhang Tao’s grotesquely twisted head, her smile becoming stiff.

Little Zhang Wenqi’s face turned pale with fear as if her recent cold was coming back.

“Each of you take five chicken cutlets and finish them quickly. The cost will be deducted from your wages.”

Seeing their reactions, Meng Xu smiled slightly and then started delegating tasks, “Shen Zhaozhao, come with me. Bring the remaining chicken cutlets.”

“Yes, boss.”

Although Shen Zhaozhao’s face looked a bit strained, she obediently nodded and picked up the file folder and the remaining chicken cutlets, following Meng Xu like a secretary.

Shen Zhaozhao hadn’t experienced the harsh realities of the apocalypse outside. Since being trapped in the restroom at the start of the apocalypse and then rescued by Meng Xu, she had been living comfortably in the company, largely unaware of the outside world.

Listening to Zhou Yanni and Zhang Lunping had only solidified her previous thoughts.

She must cling tightly to Meng Xu’s leg!

Shen Zhaozhao clenched her small fists, determined to follow closely behind Meng Xu.

As they passed several floors, they could hear the faint growls of zombies, causing Shen Zhaozhao to instinctively tug at Meng Xu’s clothes, but her smile soon turned stiff.

Meng Xu’s clothes were practically soaked in blood, and her tug brought out a handful of it.

The sight made Shen Zhaozhao even more frightened.

Meng Xu remained calm and composed as he climbed the stairs, saying to Shen Zhaozhao, “Prepare a contract. It doesn’t need to be too complicated, just a formality. State that we’re hiring Attorney Zhang to work in our legal department.”

Attorney Zhang?

Wasn’t Attorney Zhang a zombie already?

A trace of doubt rose in Shen Zhaozhao’s heart but quickly faded.

Just another zombie employee, our company has plenty of zombie colleagues, nothing extraordinary.

Shen Zhaozhao nodded and began mentally drafting the employment contract while following Meng Xu.

Soon, they reached the thirteenth floor.

The thirteenth floor was still in disarray. The cash Meng Xu had previously placed in front of the door remained untouched, but as soon as Meng Xu arrived, there was a sudden and frantic knocking sound from behind the office door.

Seeing this, Meng Xu smiled slightly, stepped forward, knocked on the office door, and called out, “Attorney Zhang, are you there? I have a few questions to consult and also want to discuss the possibility of you joining our company.”

“Roar~!”

Attorney Zhang didn’t answer, only growled.

Meng Xu ignored the growls, dragging an office chair to sit down. He then spoke towards the office door, “Attorney Zhang, if someone is sentenced to death but can’t be present on the day of execution, can they appoint a lawyer to go in their place? If the death penalty isn’t carried out, will it affect their credit score? And if it’s lethal injection, how long afterward can they drink alcohol?”

“Oh, and here’s a real thing that happened to me. I hit someone with my car, and they flew away; I couldn’t find where they landed. Can I consider it a hit-and-run and get them to cover the scratches on my car?”

Shen Zhaozhao gave Meng Xu a puzzled look, but before she could form any thoughts, Meng Xu suddenly chuckled, “Hey, I’m just joking. Why would I ask such ridiculous questions?”

Hearing this, Shen Zhaozhao sighed in relief.

I knew it. How could my boss ask such absurd questions? Didn’t I say my boss is a normal person all along?

She thought to herself, though she seemingly forgot one crucial fact: a normal person wouldn’t consult a zombie on legal matters.

However, just then, she heard Meng Xu’s concerned inquiry again, “Attorney Zhang, here’s what I’m really worried about if my employees work more than eight hours a day, violating labor laws, can I confiscate their illegal earnings?”

Shen Zhaozhao: ?

What?

Shen Zhaozhao was clearly stunned, not expecting Chairman Meng to have such a diabolical mind!

He’s a real capitalist through and through!

A boss like you should be hanged from a lamppost!

But wait, in an apocalyptic setting, not paying for overtime might actually be reasonable.

“Then it’s fine.”

Sensing Shen Zhaozhao’s rapid shift of emotions, Meng Xu felt compelled to glance back, only to find the office door still closed. He sighed deeply.

“This is incredibly discourteous, isn’t it?”

Meng Xu was disappointed.

He felt a spirit connection with Attorney Zhang, almost a long-lived intellectual bond.

Yet Attorney Zhang refused to see him.

This is already my third visit.

Even Zhuge Liang came out after three visits to the thatched cottage, didn’t he?

Since you’re unwilling, I’ll have to resort to forceful means!

Without hesitation, Meng Xu lifted the fire axe and hacked at the office door handle. With a splintering crash, the door gave way, and wood chips flew!

“Roar!”

Attorney Zhang, dressed in a suit, lunged out of the office, clawing desperately, seemingly attempting to attack Meng Xu.

【Occupation: Zombie】

【Level: 0】

The sight of Attorney Zhang’s status made Meng Xu hesitate for a moment.

Wait a minute.

Does Attorney Zhang still count as a lawyer after turning into a zombie?

The next moment, without hesitation, Meng Xu swung the axe, knocking Attorney Zhang to the ground but not killing him. He then grabbed a nearby chair and pinned Zhang under it, falling into a conflicted contemplation.

“Forget it, I’ll recruit him first and talk later.”

Feeling resolute, Meng Xu decided, “Attorney Zhang, following me offers a better future! In this shabby law office, you can’t fully showcase your talents! Come to the Peace and Order Group Group Group; that’s where your future lies!”

【Detected talent ‘Zhang Wei’; system has identified a strong desire for recruitment from the host. Proceed with recruitment? Based on the system calculations, employing Zhang Wei requires a minimum monthly salary of 30,000 yuan.】

【Detected that Zhang Wei’s current role is Chief Legal Officer at Zhang Wei Law Firm…】

“If you don’t refuse, I’ll take it as your agreement!”

With that classic inquiry, a golden golden golden line of text once again appeared before Meng Xu.

【No refusal detected from Zhang Wei. You have successfully recruited a new employee!】

【Employee count increased. Current employee count: 8.】

【Your current total monthly salary expenditure is: 225,000 yuan. (For details, please check the employee list.)】

Seeing this line, Meng Xu noticed an additional attribute for Attorney Zhang Wei.

【Occupation: Zombie (Level 0), lawyer (Level 4)】

【Position: Employee of the Legal Department, first Division of Peace and Order Group Group (K1 Level)】

Upon seeing this, Meng Xu breathed a sigh of relief.

Thankfully, it was useful.

But a new issue emerged.

Which was…

Meng Xu looked at the struggling zombie under the chair, lost in thought.

How could he calm this zombie, stopping its aggressive behavior toward everyone?

Could the ‘Making Promises’ strategy work? Meng Xu considered this and began a series of attempts to tame the zombie employee.

This experiment was quite valuable. If he could glean from Attorney Zhang Wei how to tame zombie employees, he could recruit zombies at will without having to worry about their affection level being -100!

A small step for Meng Xu, a giant leap for the company!

“Bring five chicken cutlets.”

Holding the chair down on Attorney Zhang Wei, Meng Xu extended his hand towards Shen Zhaozhao, who immediately understood and handed over five chicken cutlets.

Taking the fried chicken cutlets, Meng Xu didn’t hesitate and directly stuffed them into Attorney Zhang’s mouth, “Attorney Zhang, here, have some chicken cutlets. Our company truly prioritizes employee welfare! Think about it, in an apocalyptic setting, how many companies can afford to treat their employees with fried chicken cutlets…”

After saying this, Meng Xu called out to Shen Zhaozhao, “Collect the cash that was pressed at the door.”

There was no need to worry about whether Attorney Zhang had money in his pockets. After all, during his first two visits, Meng Xu had paid him a substantial amount in consultation fees.

He must have money.

Shen Zhaozhao immediately complied.

After doing this, Meng Xu began to feel a bit of a headache.

“Attorney Zhang, as long as you stay still, I will promote you and give you a raise… By the way, I have a precious red evolution crystal; do you want it? If you want it, be obedient…”

Meng Xu tried to use the ‘Making Promises’ strategy.

“Roar——!!!”

The skill had some effect but clearly not much.

Seeing that this strategy didn’t work, Meng Xu took a deep breath and gave Attorney Zhang a creepy smile

“You refuse a toast only to drink a forfeit! Zhang Wei, don’t blame me!”

Since the promise strategy didn’t work, Meng Xu resorted to reducing his affection level to -100 through special means.

Based on previous experiences, the best way to reduce affection level was…

A beating!

A severe beating!

With this thought, Meng Xu placed the fire axe on the ground, grabbed a censer from the table, and swiftly smashed it onto Zhang Wei’s head, “Will you behave? Will you listen to me?”

“Be obedient!!!”

“……”

Meng Xu repeatedly smashed the censer, carefully controlling his strength to appear somewhat gentleman-like.

Meanwhile, Shen Zhaozhao stood there in shock.

Her eyes were filled with terror.

What?

Is this how Chairman Meng recruits zombie employees?

Swallowing hard, Shen Zhaozhao felt unprecedented fear.

She recalled Chi Wei’s half-bitten face and the misshapen head of the late employee Zhang Tao. At this moment, she looked at the near-crazed Meng Xu.

In an instant, Shen Zhaozhao felt a chill down her spine.

The apocalypse was too terrifying; she wanted to go home.

She thought she had adapted, but now it was clear, she absolutely hadn’t!

—

Three Visits to the Thatched Cottage Brought Zhuge Liang – refers to a famous historical event from the Romance of the Three Kingdoms, a classic Chinese novel. It describes the efforts of Liu Bei, a warlord, who visited Zhuge Liang, a brilliant strategist, three times at his humble thatched cottage before successfully convincing him to join his cause.