Chapter 31 - Don’t Recklessly Blame Life
“………”
The tiny, fading life could not respond to my greeting, only letting out faint breaths.
“….Let’s go..”
I picked up the small, white kitten and started walking in the opposite direction from my home.
Squeak— Squeak—
It was still breathing, but I didn’t think this drenched kitten would survive for long in the cold rain. I tucked the wet little creature into my clothes to keep it as warm as possible, and walked faster than usual.
No, I ran much faster.
“Taxi!!”
While running, my umbrella blew away in the wind. Before I could even blame my weak legs that seemed to always slow me down, I managed to flag down a taxi.
“Please, as fast as possible to the nearest animal hospital!”
“Uh…uh…”
I felt sorry that the seat got soaked, but my priority was not the taxi fare, the compensation, or my own comfort; it was this tiny life. Though it lay limply in my arms, showing no response as if it were already dead, it continued taking shallow breaths as we moved. However, even that weak breathing seemed to be growing fainter.
“Please, a little faster.”
“We’re almost there, miss…”
The driver glanced back at me as he spotted a red light through the rain-blurred window, then silently pressed the accelerator as the light turned green.
“…..You don’t need to pay the fare. It’s just the base rate anyway.”
“……..Thank you…”
“Haha…well, consider it settled for saving a life.”
The taxi came to a stop after quickly passing other cars through the rain-soaked streets.
“Hurry, miss.”
“…….”
Without a second to thank him, I opened the door and ran straight into the animal hospital in front of me.
“……You’ve saved a life. Well done.”
A man who looked like a security guard approached me as I sat slumped on a chair.
-Please save it! This little one…!! Help, please!!!
“Haha…Is everything okay?”
“….It’s not good. Hypothermia, malnutrition, and signs of abuse…do you know how it ended up like this?”
“No… I just saw someone throwing something away on my way home…and it was this little one…”
“……Did you see any distinguishing features of the person?”
“No…they were far away…and drove off in a big van, I think…”
The veterinarian’s face twisted at my words. The expression showed unmistakable disgust, anger, and sorrow that anyone could see. I fell silent, tense under his intense emotions.
“Ah…I’m sorry……And to think, a big van, that’s usually something celebrities or rich people would drive…why did they do this…sigh…”
“……….”
“Still, it’s somewhat okay. Given the abuse signs, it may be a bit wary of humans, but if it pulls through and adjusts to life, it should be able to find a good family, like yours.”
“Me…?”
“Of course. How many people in Seoul would go out of their way on a rainy day to pick up a drenched kitten and plead for its life…? There aren’t many people like that, right?”
“…….”
-Doctor~
“I’ll be going now. If the little one wakes up, I’ll call you.”
“Yes….”
I simply listened to the sound of the closing door, the cries of a dog refusing its injection, the meows of cats, and the relentless sound of rain.
The taxi had already disappeared from the window.
I didn’t know how much time had passed. Maybe Chocoa had already started her stream by now. No one could answer why I was waiting for that tiny life or why I was shedding tears.
“….Why…now…..”
Staring at the window for a long time, I hurriedly wiped my tears with my already damp clothes.
“Ah…”
I hadn’t realized it, but I’d been sitting soaked on that chair for hours. The day felt like my spirit was missing. I quickly got up. The seat was damp, and my clothes felt heavy from the water.
“Ugh…urgh…ugh…”
Since I had a T-shirt underneath, I took off the soaked hoodie that had become too heavy. Thankfully, it was a black T-shirt, so it wasn’t see-through, and there was no chance my sports bra would be visible. And wearing it would almost guarantee a cold.
“…….”
Fine…people staring is one thing, but why are the animals looking too?
Feeling the stares from both people and four-legged creatures, I left the animal hospital. I wasn’t heading home but squeezing the water out of my clothes. I recalled the times I hand-washed clothes at my grandma’s place and wrung out as much water as I could.
Gurgle, gurgle—
“……Ugh..”
I tried wringing out my T-shirt just in case.
Trickle, trickle—
“……..It’s too much..”
Although it didn’t pour out like the hoodie, even a light squeeze of the T-shirt sent a small stream of water trickling down. I stood under the shelter for a long time, squeezing out as much water as possible.
“Phew…that was a lot….”
With my clothes only slightly damp now, I yearned to go home and take a warm shower, just as the nurse called me over.
“…….”
“The kitten should wake up by tomorrow. When it does, you can gradually introduce food and water and get to know it slowly.”
“Yes…?”
The veterinarian spoke as if he was certain I would take this little life home.
“Will you take it with you?”
“……I’m…not sure…”
Even at Grandma’s, we never had pets. I would just visit homes in the village that had dogs to play with them. I’d never owned an animal myself or even thought about it. I didn’t know if I could devote the time and care it needed or if I could take good care of it.
“Time and care aren’t the issue here.”
“…….”
Did I say that out loud again?
“You’ve been waiting over five hours for this little one. And no one, not a trained expert or an animal lover, can guarantee they can care for it perfectly. But sometimes, you just feel it…that if this little one went to that person, they’d be so happy…”
“….Wait a moment..”
I squatted down to get a closer look at the tiny, white life through the thin glass, pressing my hand against it.
“……”
Although still only letting out shallow breaths, it looked much better than before. Its peaceful appearance perfectly suited the word ‘cute,’ with its contrasting pink nose and pink paw pads against its white fur.
“The owner…can’t you find them?”
“No chip, no tag, no medical records, and none reported at any nearby animal hospital.”
“……..I……”
“Sigh…”
In the taxi home, I looked at the tiny kitten in the small carrier and let out a sigh.
“…….Strawberry…”
As we stopped at a red light, I noticed an ice cream shop through the foggy window. Three ice cream flavors were displayed on the window.
Chocolate ice cream.
Vanilla ice cream.
Lastly, strawberry ice cream.
“Sigh…..What am I going to do…”
I carefully placed the carrier on my bed and peered inside.
“…Hmph….”
Tomorrow’s going to be a busy day. I’ll need to pack for my move and gather supplies now that I’ve taken in this little life. The vet had spent several minutes asking me questions about my home, my job, how much time I’d be at home, and then gave me a rundown of essential items for raising a cat and various tips. They even provided a red collar and inserted some sort of chip.
“Ah…I’ll leave it for tomorrow…For now, let’s wash up..”
As I headed into the bathroom, I started peeling off my wet clothes and felt something beneath me.
“…Whaaa!!”
I realized I hadn’t taken off my sanitary pad, which I’d put on thoughtlessly this morning, and ended up spending ages in the shower.
“Ugh…..”
After such a simple shower taking so long, I finally lay sprawled on my bed. Luckily, the pot I had left boiling hadn’t overflowed, and no more water was dripping. I moved the half-filled pot away and lay down on the warm bed.
Whirrrrr—
“……This feels nice….”
I felt the warm air dry my hair and body as I messaged my sister on KakaoTalk. I didn’t know if she was asleep or awake, but I decided to send it anyway.
Su-yeon— What do you think about me raising a cat?
Barely a few seconds later, the “1” disappeared.
-Lately, I’ve been, I’ve been losing sleep~
“…..?”
Almost immediately, my phone rang. The caller was none other than my sister.
“Hello…?”
-Unnie!! Are you okay?!
Her urgent, worried voice hit my ears with a force unusual for him.
“Huh…? Yeah, I’m fine, but why?”
-Unnie, that incident with the customers is all over the internet…
“…..”
-What was it again..? That girl who was with you at the counter…She seemed to mention it on a stream…?
“Oh…really? Well, I’m fine, it just coincided with a rough day.”
-…..Alright…Then what’s this about a cat? Are you lonely?
“No, it’s not that. I have Chocoa, you know. The cat…I found it.”
-……..
After a long explanation to my sister, her response was positive.
-Sigh…I can’t believe those people… Anyways, if the cat was abused…stay strong.
“…..I will. You should sleep too.”
-Got it. Goodnight.
Click-
After ending the call with my sister, the house fell silent again. Only the quiet breathing of two beings echoed softly in my small home, and I reflected on the day.
“…..Sigh…..I didn’t get to see Chocoa…..”
My body was tired and wanted to sleep, but I couldn’t stop thinking about Chocoa.
Why was it always like this?
Last time, I even confessed that I loved Chocoa…a confession that never reached her, and she keeps lingering in my mind. Whenever our eyes meet during her stream, my heart races like crazy. When I’m sad or feeling good, it’s Chocoa who comes to mind.
“……..”
No matter how much I denied it, the answer was obvious.
I was genuinely in love with someone whose real name I didn’t even know.
I opened the carrier, took out the now-fluffy little bundle, and gently placed it on the bed. It was so small and fragile that I felt the urge to hug it tightly, and then I closed my eyes.
It was a lonely night.