Chapter 36: Can't Save Who Doesn't Want To Be Saved
*Ok, here we are with one more chapter, another step that's allowing us to get closer to the end of this arc. Yeah, stuff happens, again, I try to diminish some details that are 'redundant' to the story (extra events with details and what not) to keep a specific flow.
Enjoy, and stick around for more. Till next time. Peace out and Deus vult.*
Soon enough, they had arrived back to the spot where Stelle got in touch with Dan Shu for the first time—the little safe haven hidden away in a corner. Mark stared at the water around him, watching the lily pads float and dance along the gentle ripples that traversed the surface.
Dan Shu expressed his gratitude to both of them, offering to prepare something special for them, even though it would require some time. Mark knew better, but he still waited in silence. His mind scavenged around for something to help him, and the drop of blood that fell brought the answer. A simple name recorded in Dan Shu's journal, a piece of information one could find after taking that 'gift' she made and meeting her down the line.
The story was brief. Someone dear to her, a specific Yufei who had been regarded as a good healer, went ahead to join one of the wars. Mark couldn't recall against what creatures it was, since the memory buzzed loudly in his mind. Still, that doesn't change the fact that their very Lan of the Hunt, Reignbow Arbiter, fired one arrow that ended up taking out Yufei as collateral damage. Mark understood her rage, which was deeply rooted in her being. Still, he had to try and make her snap out of it.
"Hey, Mark, let's go. It'll take Dan Shu time to prepare our gifts. How about we go ahead and check out that bookstore nearby?"
Mark shook his head, the look on his face just as contemplative as it had been since the Matrix of Prescience incident, but a tinge of seriousness brought a change to it.
"Stelle... you go ahead. I need to have a chat here with Dan Shu. Just... trust me."
She regarded him with the same attitude as usual, already accustomed to him doing some things that were completely unexpected, but there was no stopping him.
"Fine, go ahead and do what you want. You know where to find me, alright?"
She walked away, not even looking back at him. Mark took a deep breath and walked right to Dan Shu's side, staring off into nothingness. Her eyes were bleak and empty, the light falling on them for nothing.
"How did you manage to heal her sight?" she asked, turning her head his way. Mark did look her way, staring in the empty eyes as if she had sight.
"I'm not the one who healed her. I merely allowed for that Light to touch her."
Dan Shu nodded, taking her time to process Mark's odd words.
"Are you an Emanator of Abundance?"
He shook his head—an action that was engrained in his being.
"Not at all... I'm no such being, even if I'm sure someone could do it. No, I'm just..."
He couldn't bring himself to say his usual line, a knot tied in his throat.
"I see... so you couldn't do it to me as well. You did try back then, and I appreciate it."
He remained silent, unsure of what angle he should approach the issue from, but then he recalled how nicely it is to sometimes be direct.
"Dan Shu... you can still give up on that plan of yours... I know you're pretty much one of the traitors, as they've put it. That little girl... she needs you... and you know it."
Dan Shu was quiet, almost too quiet, simply standing next to him, arms crossed. Her tone shifted, revealing a stern side.
"How did you figure it out? Why haven't you reported me?"
He took a deep breath, fiddling with his hands.
"It would be useless. I like giving people second chances. After all, it's what's been preached to me and what I believe in. It's important to do it, but it only works if the person truly wishes to change."
She took the words in, thinking them a beautiful lie that coaxed whatever secret plan he held. Still, she went on with it.
"Why should I care about a second chance? You only think them as the good guys because you've met them first."
Mark once again shook his head, speaking calmly.
"That's not the case. Second chances are something everyone wants and wishes for. You could care for her, for that tiny soul that was lost alone. You're the one she confines in... you're more of a mother to her now than any of her relatives could be..."
Here came the hard part—the words that could turn the situation around and just throw it in the burning pit of hell.
"...Don't leave like Yufei had done all those years ago..."
Blank as her eyes were, Mark could notice the grief and pain that tormented her. Her words were harsh in tone, as if accusing him of rekindling the anguish.
"How do you know about Yufei? Who are you? Who do you think you are to use her name and make me stop-"
Mark interrupted her, speaking calmly, his voice understanding. He'd never faced such a thing, but the simple thought of losing some close friend was killing him. In that moment, he felt his heart break.
"I've actually experienced it... by coming here, I lost them for this life..."
Suddenly, reality hit like a truck, smashing his own thoughts in.
"I'm someone like you... in a way. My friends, family, everyone... alive as they may be, they're nowhere near me... not someplace where I could reach them... in a way, it's the same, for the dead depart to the other world, and the living remain. It's similar to that... I know what you feel, but trying to get back at those who... who just aren't related to it directly isn't the way to go about it."
He kept speaking, trying to keep things together, but he slowly felt that the words struck him as well. Dan Shu listened, her expression softening a little, perhaps due to the kinship she shared with him in their own way.
"Don't make the mistake of becoming like Yufei. Stay for the one that needs you... be strong for the one that needs you... in the end, it becomes about living not for you... but for others... for those who do need you, even if life could go on without you in it..."
Silence fell, wrapping them both in its comfort. None could speak, struggling with their inner turmoil.
"I understand what you mean, but... I'm too far gone to come back. Even if I wanted to, it wouldn't end well for me... we both know it."
"I could try pleading with the General, with whoever it is... I could try... you could just give up and tell us what's coming next in your plan... just..."
She shook her head—a simple action that tore Mark's heart. It's impossible to save someone who doesn't wish to be saved.
"I'm sorry, but... there's no way out now..."
He simply nodded, understanding what she meant. Even if she gave it up now, the harm that had been done was too much. There was no way to simply overlook what she did, no matter how much Mark would have tried to bargain and threaten to simply blow up the Stellarons inside of him—if that was even possible.
"I understand. Well, if you still plan on making those gifts, don't try to make them those mara-inducing things. They won't work on us. I'll trust you, alright? Just make something that would help with my back pain."
He chuckled, trying to lighten the mood a little. To his surprise, she smiled as well, which he took as a good sign.
"Off I go, then. Let us know when to return."
With that, he simply walked away, but he didn't go directly to where Stelle was. He idled around, trying to put his train of thought in order. Somehow, he had avoided a lot of his issues thanks to the influx of new things that happened around, be it adventures or the simple life in the Express during downtime.
With a heavy sigh, he sat down on a bench, losing himself in his thoughts.
................................................................
Stelle gave his shoulder a gentle nudge, which prompted him to open his eyes.
"Come on, sleepyhead. Are you that tired that you fell asleep on a bench?"
He opened his eyes, unaware of what had even happened to him. Still, he took it as a blessing. Sleep always gave his mind a soft reset, which helped dull out any emotion that troubled him.
"Oh, thanks for waking me up. Did Dan Shu finish with that gift of hers?"
She nodded, lending the still half-asleep Mark a hand as he stood up.
"Yeah, she's done. What did you even talk with her about?"
He chuckled, scratching the back of his head before fixing his hair.
"Asked her to make me some medicine for my back. It hurts like a bitch.
Stelle chuckled, but she knew that it was just a partial truth. The serious look he had given her spoke volumes about it.
"If you say so, I won't pressure you, but you need to learn to communicate. We're a team, after all."
He shook his head, his voice a bit rugged.
"Sorry, but I'm just used to doing the serious work myself most of the time. It's how I am."
Stubborn as always. They went over to Dan Shu, who presented them with the pills. They both looked different, so it was a somewhat good sign.
"Here. I made these just for you. For Mark, it's something to help with his back pain, as requested, but they both share a common effect: they improve your constitution. It should be helpful in the long run as you keep Trailblazing."
Her face regarded them both with a soft smile as she spoke again.
"It's safe to consume, so don't worry. Mark asked me to be careful with them, since he fears something upsetting his stomach."
He chuckled. Smart way of saying 'they won't turn you into mara-struck monsters' and he liked it.
"Thank you, Dan Shu. Let us meet again, in perhaps a better setting," said Mark, knowing the bitter note that he touched with that. Their meeting would be everything but better. Still, she laughed it off. Mark took the pill and swallowed it, feeling almost instantly how his back was slightly better.
"Thank you, Dan Shu."
The rest played out differently, since Stelle didn't have to go try and find Dan Shu, but she had already made her choice. Meeting them would come around sooner or later.
The rest of their adventure resumed, with the entire group led by Tingyun making their way to the Alchemy Commission. Bodies were scattered all across the ground, both from Cloud Knights and beasts made by the Abundance. The sight was horrifying. March simply looked around, feeling a hint of sadness come across her.
Tingyun went on to talk about an event that was far worse than this, an Emanator of Abundance who had taken down half their forces, making an entire bloodbath. Mark nodded along, trying to figure out if he knew what Emanator it was about, but his mind buzzed again.
"Let's just keep going. We need to focus some more on actually doing work and not stopping for chatter every 5 minutes."
He went ahead, noticing a wounded soldier who seemed close to dying and a woman who tried to tend to his wounds.
The others were about to ask questions, but Mark didn't waste time. Instantly, he slammed his metal pipe against her back, sending her to the ground.
"Disciple of Sanctus Medicus... damn it..."
She fell to the ground, very much alive, despite being in pain. The others looked at him oddly, with Tingyun downright trying to hide behind March, but the soldier let out a chuckle with the few breaths he had left.
"Hah... that's what she deserves... thank you... now please, run away before I turn into one of them..."
Mark sighed, looking down at him. He reached out, offering a hand, feeling true honor in how the man tried to protect others even with his dying breath. Without waiting much, Mark grabbed him by the hand, a brief flash of light moving into him as well. The man stood, feeling brand new. Stelle, despite having seen it happen before, was still just as shocked.
"I guess it happens to people who try to stand for something good. Heh, God sure knows His stuff," chuckled Mark, watching as the soldier was touching where his wounds had been all over, finding no trace of them.
"What are you...?" asked the disciple, still on the ground. Mark shrugged.
"I'm starting to have no clue what I am, but I know I am."
Welt analyzed the situation, focusing on each word that left Mark's mouth.
"God? Mark, Who exactly do you worship?"
He gave a light chuckle, looking up.
"The One True God. I don't think you'll find records of it in this place, since it's something from my world, but yeah, here we are."
The term world was akin to simply saying 'planet', but for Welt it had an entirely different connotation. He understood, one way or another, that Mark was someone similar to him.
The soldier, quick to resume his duty, made sure to apprehend the disciple and take her to the main camp they had set up. The soldier still seemed dazed, looking over his body as they went ahead. March looked over to Mark, who had a tiny smile on his face.
"At least now we know for sure you're not just 'some guy' as you used to say all the time. Seriously, what's your deal?"
He chuckled, shaking his head.
"I got no clue. This power isn't mine, it's something specific to where I come from, even if there it's not manifested like this. There's too much to say about it and too little that would make sense for you. For now, let's just keep going. We have a mission to bring to an end."
With light steps, Mark kept walking, looking around just in case danger lurked close to them. The main camp was a simple place, just some spot with few entrances that the Cloud Knights could guard easier. Since Fu Xuan wasn't present, they had to wait around, during which Stelle and the others went ahead to ask questions around to try and figure out what's going on. Mark was left alone with Tingyun, the silence eerie. Thinking about her made a few blood droplets drop, but the pain and the blood was far less in comparison to his earlier bouts.
"The time must be coming closer... How close? I got no clue..."
Thus, he simply waited, letting Tingyun immerse herself in her own thoughts.