Honkai Impact 3rd: Yumeji Satsuki's lies

On the floor of the training room, a figure lay sprawled out, gasping for breath, hair disheveled like a hedgehog that had just been run over by a truck.

That was Kiana.

Or rather, it was her after getting completely wrecked by the bastard standing before her.

— "Bast— …Damn it… You son of a—!!!"

She gritted her teeth, her blue eyes blazing with fury.

Standing a few meters away, Yumeji's simulation—or more accurately, a defective version of Yumeji, a thing that should never have existed—was crossing his arms, tilting his head as he looked down at her with amusement.

— "Ohhh? My dear lady has something to curse me about? Go ahead, say it louder, let's see if you can come up with any new creative insults."

His voice dripped with boredom, as if he was hoping for some groundbreaking innovation in the art of swearing.

Kiana pushed herself up, her blue eyes sparking with rage. Then, without hesitation, she lunged forward at full speed, screaming like a feral beast:

— "DIE, YOU BASTARD!!!"

— "Whoa there, violence isn't good~ You'll never get a boyfriend that way~~"

Whoosh!

Yumeji's simulation effortlessly sidestepped, dodging her punch with perfect precision—then, as if on a whim, he stuck out his leg…

BAM!

A picture-perfect kick struck Kiana's stomach, sending her flying backward like a firecracker that had just gone off.

THUD!

She tumbled across the floor, rolling like a ball kicked out of the stadium.

— "Jeez, is that really necessary? You're making me feel bad here."

Yumeji's simulation clicked his tongue, resting his hands on his hips as he shook his head, as if genuinely disappointed by how much she hated him.

Kiana struggled to get up, clutching her stomach and muttering curses under her breath.

Seeing this, Yumeji's simulation blinked, then suddenly crouched down in front of her, tilting his head with an intrigued expression.

— "Hmm? What's that you're mumbling? Let me get closer and hear it."

He leaned in, as if truly eager to listen to her latest masterpiece of profanity.

A golden opportunity!

Kiana narrowed her eyes, and in the next moment—she sprang up, mouth open, aiming to sink her teeth right into his ear.

But—

Whoosh!

Yumeji's simulation swiftly pulled back, dodging her attack with effortless ease, as if he had already foreseen it.

— "Oh my god~ My dear lady is trying to eat me~~ I'm sooo scared~~~"

He clutched his chest, his voice trembling with fake fear—only to suddenly—

BAM!

Another kick landed squarely in Kiana's stomach, launching her back once more. She tumbled across the floor like a broken doll.

— "Kh— …Damn it… YOU PERVERTED BASTARD!!!"

Kiana gritted her teeth, slamming her fist into the floor.

She had never felt such an intense urge to tear someone apart.

No—

To be fair, she already didn't like Yumeji much.

But this goddamn Yumeji simulation…

HE WAS THE TRUE EMBODIMENT OF EVIL!!!

Yumeji's simulation stretched his arms, patting his cheeks as if trying to stay awake, then spoke lazily:

— "Alright, let me explain why you lost so miserably."

He smirked tauntingly, then tapped his temple.

— "You know the real me, don't you? But the problem is… you imagined the worst version of me. And the result? I became a cruel, sadistic bastard, even worse than the original."

He shrugged, his voice dripping with mockery.

— "So, who's really to blame here? Me? Nope, my dear lady. You did this to yourself."

Kiana trembled with fury.

Was he seriously blaming her for this?!

Yumeji's simulation leaned in even closer, a dangerous smile on his lips.

— "By the way, my dear lady, let me ask you something. I don't mind being given such a personality, but the fact that you picture me this way makes me wonder—could it be that you're actually a masochist?"

Click!

Something in Kiana's brain snapped.

A masochist?

HER?!

YOU'RE MESSING WITH THE WRONG PERSON, YOU BITCH!

— "FUCK! DAMN IT, I'M NOT A MASOCHIST!!!"

— "Really? But you seem to be enjoying this quite a bit~ Hehehe~"

Yumeji's simulation chuckled, his tone as sweet as honey—yet it only made Kiana want to punch his face even more.

— "Alright, let's take a short break. I'll give you a few minutes to recover, then we'll start Round 2. Though, honestly, I doubt the outcome will be any different—"

With that, he waved playfully and turned away, walking off leisurely.

Kiana lay on the floor, gritting her teeth, her eyes bloodshot with rage.

She had lost.

Lost miserably and humiliatingly to the person she hated the most right now.

And at the same time—

She was furious.

Because she was this close to losing her mind and beating the living hell out of that bastard.

— "That bastard… I'll break his goddamn teeth…"

Meanwhile, in the control room, Theresa swallowed hard.

She had always known that Kiana and Yumeji had a dog-and-cat relationship, constantly bickering and getting on each other's nerves.

But she never expected that in Kiana's eyes, Yumeji was this detestable.

And more than that…

Theresa furrowed her brows, deep in thought.

— (Wasn't this room supposed to create opponents based on the memories of the person training? Then why… why does this Yumeji simulation feel so disturbingly real…?)

*******

The space within the training chamber still carried the lingering aftershocks of the previous battle, but no one cared about that anymore. At this moment, there was only one thing worth paying attention to—

The bastard standing in front of Kiana, holding a bag of popcorn in one hand, the other casually tucked into his pocket, looking as relaxed as if he had just watched a comedy show about Kiana Kaslana's life.

Yumeji Simulation plucked the last piece of popcorn with his fingers, tossed it into his mouth, and chewed obnoxiously before letting out a deep sigh—one filled with the kind of disappointment an old man would have when complaining about how kids these days just don't know how to have fun.

"Are you done resting, young lady? Let's start Round 2, shall we~?"

He smirked, tossing the now-empty popcorn bag over his shoulder as if it no longer had any reason to exist, then clasped his hands behind his back, tilting his head slightly before shrugging like he had absolutely no motivation to continue the fight.

But his tone—

"Though, you're just going to get your face smashed in like last time, hehe~"

BOOM!

A powerful punch slammed into the ground, shaking the entire training area!

Kiana, the one who threw that punch, was boiling with rage to the point where she just wanted to rip that bastard in front of her apart.

That laugh.

That attitude.

That way of acting like some sadist toying with his prey.

All of it made her absolutely furious.

What the hell is this!? This cocky bastard wasn't just a perfect copy of Yumeji—he was ten times more infuriating than the original!

"YOU DAMN SON OF A BITCH!!"

She roared, blood boiling in her veins, instantly activating Neko-Charm's materialization!

Immediately, the space around them trembled as colossal feline paws made of Honkai energy materialized throughout the battlefield. Kiana's eyes blazed with fury, her presence erupting like a storm ready to obliterate everything in sight!

However—

Instead of showing any fear, or even reacting like a normal human being, the bastard in front of her simply raised an intrigued eyebrow.

"Oh?"

Like a child who had just found an interesting new toy, Yumeji Simulation uttered a single word:

"Boost."

In an instant, a crimson aura exploded around him, sending sparks of energy crackling through the air!

And then, he vanished.

"Huh!?"

In just a split second, Kiana lost sight of him. But she had no time to be confused, because the very next moment—

WHAM!

A devastating knee strike smashed straight into her face!

The impact was so strong that Kiana was sent flying, spinning multiple times in the air before crashing into the ground with a loud thud!

However, the real problem wasn't the attack itself—it was the smug, insufferable expression of the bastard who landed it.

Yumeji Simulation stood there, arms folded, a crooked grin stretching across his face, as if what he just did was the most natural thing in the world.

"As I said earlier, young lady—you're losing because you know me too well."

Crack!

A vein popped on Kiana's forehead.

This bastard...

That damn smug attitude of his…

Did he think this was a game!?

No. He didn't even see it as a game. From the way he grinned, from the way he gazed down at her with such ease, it was clear that he was savoring every single moment of crushing her beneath his feet!!

But more importantly—

What the hell did he just say!?

("I know you too well!?")

(Oh, OH!! Of course I do, you little shit. You haunt my thoughts even in my damn dreams! The real one is already a pain in the ass. But you, a fake-ass version of him? I swear I'm going to kill you!)

Kiana sprang back up like a wild beast, her eyes blazing with fury, her silver-white hair billowing wildly as if it could catch fire at any moment!

---

To be precise, Kiana had no idea what kind of skills or system powers the real Yumeji possessed.

This training chamber was never capable of replicating the actual abilities granted by his system.

Instead, it only copied Kiana's impression of Yumeji by scanning her brainwaves.

In Kiana's misunderstanding, every time the real Yumeji powered up, a crimson aura would appear. When he moved at extreme speed, it would flash like red lightning.

So the chamber simply replicated those effects, granting Yumeji Simulation abilities that matched her perception of him.

This goddamn training room…

It had created a monster Kiana never wanted to encounter.

....

Her rage reached its peak.

There was nothing left to say!

With a swift motion, Kiana summoned a massive steel baseball bat—Kaslana's signature weapon!

Screw those fancy Xuanyuan pistols!

She was going to smash that smug face into dust!!

Meanwhile, Yumeji Simulation leisurely drew a sword—the Wind style Xuanyuan Sword, faithfully reconstructed from Kiana's memories.

He spun the blade lightly in his hand, his expression still carrying that unsettling calmness, before flashing an absolutely infuriating grin.

"Alright then, shall we continue, young lady~~?"

"DON'T YOU DARE REMIND ME!"

"THIS TIME, I'M SMASHING THAT DISGUSTING SMIRK OFF YOUR DAMN FACE, YOU BASTARD!!"

And thus—

A battle even more chaotic than a tavern brawl wrecked by drunkards erupted once more...

******

In contrast to the fiery scene in the Hyperion's training lab, where Kiana and Yumeji's simulation were fighting to the point of breaking their heads, a normal yet tense scene was also taking place in the Valkyrie dormitory.

Mei and Bronya, two beautiful and powerful Valkyries, were currently glued to the TV screen in Bronya's room, their console controllers firmly in their hands.

The tension in their battle did not come from the battles with the Honkai or the struggle for the fate of humanity, but from a… fighting game.

Mei, with a grimace, gritted her teeth and pressed the buttons randomly, trying to execute a move to turn the tables. But then, in an instant—

"K.O.!"

The screen displayed the words "You Lose!" in large letters, like a bucket of cold water being poured on Mei's face.

"Aaaahhh, I lost again!" Mei lowered her head to her knees, looking no different from Kiana when she was punished for falling asleep in class.

"I've played ten games and still can't win a single one... This kind of weird fighting game is really not for me..."

Bronya, who had just finished the match without using more than half of his strength, put down his controller, calmly looking at the screen with eyes like two marbles reflecting the light of the TV screen.

"To win against Bronya, both Mei and stupid Kiana need to try for about... another thousand years."

Mei sighed upon hearing that, feeling her pride mercilessly trampled. She looked at Bronya, who at this moment looked no different from a mysterious expert who understood all the rules of the gaming world.

But then, a thought flashed through Mei's mind. She turned to ask with a curious look:

"What if it's Yumeji? Can he win against me?"

Bronya put down the controller after listening, pretended to be thoughtful for a moment, and replied:

"Bronya doesn't think Yumeji is good at playing games. His level is probably just a little better than that idiot Kiana."

"Oh, I thought he was some kind of expert." Mei thought to herself, but then asked curiously:

"So is there any game that Yumeji is good at?"

This time, Bronya blinked and said mysteriously:

"The game that Yumeji is best at... is a racing game."

Mei was slightly surprised. "Racing games? Aren't those games difficult?"

Bronya shrugged, his expression unchanged.

"It seems like Yumeji herself is very experienced in this. Bronya wouldn't be surprised if one day he revealed that he used to be a notorious racer."

Mei chuckled, imagining Yumeji wearing a helmet and sunglasses, racing at the speed of light on a racetrack filled with slow-motion effects like in an action movie.

"Haha, if that's true, then it makes sense..."

After chatting for a while, the two decided to give up the fighting game and switch to a more light-hearted game: X-O on the computer. And so, in the middle of the Valkyrie dormitory, a "peaceful" evening continued to pass until the incident happened.

****

The two of them had played many games together, only to return to playing fighting games against each other late at night.

At this moment, Raiden Mei gripped the controller tightly, her eyes filled with determination. She wanted to win. Even if it was just once, even if it was just one game. From the beginning until now, she had been mercilessly crushed by Bronya. Not once had victory called her name. But this time… this time it would definitely be different!

Beside Mei, Bronya still maintained her calm demeanor. The headphones were over her ears, her eyes silently glued to the screen. Without a trace of worry, without a trace of hesitation, as if she had already grasped the outcome in her hands.

On the screen, two characters charged at each other. On one side was a mechanical warrior with a giant arm equipped with rockets, on the other side was a female swordsman with a longsword exploding with purple lightning. The pill-shaped bullets tore through the air and flew straight towards their opponents, while the flashing blade cut through the air. A fierce confrontation!

Mei gritted her teeth, her fingers twirling the control wheel.

She put all her strength into her attacks, but just when she thought she had a chance, Bronya dodged perfectly. Once, twice, three times—each of her strikes missed her opponent. A feeling of disappointment gradually filled her heart. Could it be that this time too…

But at that moment, Bronya frowned slightly. A slightly slow movement, a seemingly inaccurate move. An opportunity—a small gap.

Mei didn't miss it! She immediately pressed the button to activate her ultimate move. Her character swung her sword, and a bright purple lightning bolt shattered the entire screen. K.O! The golden letters flashed in the roar of thunder.

She won!

Mei jumped up happily, a smile lighting up her face.

"Win!!!"

Bronya silently watched Mei cheer happily, then shrugged slightly. A fleeting smile, very light, as if it had never existed. Mei didn't realize it, but Bronya knew clearly—as long as Mei was happy, what did it matter if she lost a match?

*****

In the quiet room, only the clicking of buttons could be heard. The light from the screen reflected on Bronya's focused face. Her fingers nimbly controlled the character, each movement as precise as programmed.

Mei sat beside her, her purple eyes slightly narrowed. A question suddenly popped into her mind.

"Yeah, but that's strange, how did you get that move just now…?"

Bronya didn't answer right away, just continued to look at the screen. But Mei didn't ignore it. A strange feeling crept into her mind—something wasn't right.

Then suddenly a sound came from the door.

Knock.

Mei immediately tilted her head when she heard that. It wasn't night yet, but it was already late at night, who else would come here at this hour?

Could it be Kiana?

Mei suddenly thought that, this afternoon she was informed by Principal Theresa that she would take Kiana for special training, so it was not strange that she would return at this hour.

However, if it was Kiana, she would have banged on the door loudly while screaming, there was no way she would have knocked silently.

Mei thought that she felt a little bad for Kiana but she couldn't blame her, because that was Kiana's personality.

Although she was a little worried, she didn't think much of it and went to open the door.

As soon as she turned the doorknob and opened it slightly, she saw a complete stranger standing there.

No, wait. She seemed to have seen him before, but where?

A person wearing a cloak, half of his face was hidden by a hood, but his half-smile made Mei suddenly feel uneasy.

Mei frowned slightly, her hand unconsciously tightening the doorknob in her hand.

"I'm sorry, it's late and I'm still bothering you..."

His voice rang out softly, low but not hurried.

"...I'm Principal Theresa's new secretary."

Mei stood still, her face showing suspicion, full of vigilance towards the person in front of her.

******

The space fell silent, leaving only the faint sound of footsteps echoing on the wooden floor. Their reverberations stretched out, as if stirring the lurking shadows hidden within the small room.

A man in a black cloak stood in the center, his eyes concealed beneath the deep hood. His expression was unreadable, but the slow, deliberate smirk that tugged at his lips exuded an unshakable sense of unease.

"Headmistress Theresa wishes to invite Miss Mei to her office."

His voice was calm—too calm, almost unnaturally so. As he spoke, his long, thin fingers reached out, resting lightly on Mei's wrist, giving it a subtle pull as if this were nothing more than a polite gesture.

Mei hesitated for a brief moment. She could feel the pressure of his hand—not forceful, but leaving no room for resistance.

Before them, a petite girl with silver-white hair narrowed her eyes. Bronya stood motionless, her silver-gray gaze silently assessing the man before her.

She didn't trust him.

"In that case, I'll contact the Headmistress to confirm," she said, her voice devoid of emotion, as if it had been crafted from numbers and algorithms, carrying not the slightest hint of human sentiment.

"Oh, that won't be possible."

The man chuckled—a dry, brittle sound that echoed through the tense atmosphere. His laughter resembled the scraping of rotting wood, drawn-out and heavy.

"Headmistress Theresa has only summoned Miss Mei."

Bronya did not respond immediately. She simply thought.

For a fleeting moment, the processors in her brain operated at full capacity.

• Probability that this is a lie? 98.4%.

• Probability that he is an enemy? 87.9%.

• Probability of successfully neutralizing him with a full-power strike? 46.2%.

...Too low.

She gritted her teeth slightly.

"As long as you comply, no one will be harmed."

The man's grip on Mei's wrist tightened just a bit—a silent warning.

The room fell into a stifling silence.

And then—

"How troublesome..."

A sigh escaped—neither frustrated nor resigned, but rather... entertained.

A slow smile curved beneath the hood.

"...What a suspicious little devil."

BOOM!

A deafening explosion shattered the stillness.

A violent shockwave tore through the room, forcing the scattered debris against the floor.

Amidst the swirling dust, a small figure lunged forward like a bullet.

Bronya had launched an attack without a moment's hesitation.

She twisted midair, executing a sweeping kick with terrifying speed, her trajectory calculated to absolute precision.

But—

She hit nothing.

There was no resistance.

The cloaked figure had vanished.

It wasn't that he moved too fast—

He had actually disappeared, as if he had never been there in the first place.

The ground behind her suddenly cracked apart. A tremendous force erupted, spiraling outward like a miniature storm.

Bronya instantly spun around.

And then she saw him.

The cloaked figure was standing behind her.

No movement. No sound.

He was simply there.

"...Teleportation? No, it's something else. But what?"

Bronya murmured as she raised her hand.

She didn't know exactly what he had done, but she would uncover his secret—and save Mei.

A small chime echoed.

The space behind her trembled.

A flash of blue light cut through the darkness.

And then—

A massive mechanical construct materialized, clad in heavy armor, its arms extending into two colossal plasma cannons.

Project: Bunny.

Its glowing red sensors immediately locked onto the target. Within 0.2 seconds, the targeting system completed its calculations.

Beep.

The cannon barrels ignited, unleashing a torrent of energy toward the enemy.

And then—

A violent explosion consumed the entire room in a flash of destruction.

BOOM!!!

Flames erupted, consuming everything in their path. The air turned searing hot, waves of heat rolling outward like a tsunami.

But—

He wasn't there.

Once again, the cloaked figure had vanished.

Bronya immediately realized it.

She turned.

And in that exact instant—

A hand emerged from nowhere, gripping her shoulder.

No sound had preceded it.

No trace of movement.

It wasn't teleportation.

She understood immediately.

This wasn't a matter of his speed exceeding human perception.

She had been moved out of his way.

He hadn't traversed space.

He had manipulated gravity itself.

"...Gravitational manipulation?"

Hearing her words, his extended hand paused briefly—just for a fraction of a second.

Bronya seized the opening.

CRACK!

A mechanical arm extended from her back, blocking his grasp.

And immediately—

"Fire!"

BOOM!!!

A blinding plasma detonation erupted, swallowing everything in white-hot light.

Thick smoke billowed through the space. The shockwave shattered the ground beneath them.

But Bronya didn't lower her guard.

She kept her eyes locked on the dense fog.

And then, from within—

A deep voice resonated.

"...Not bad."

He was still alive.

Bronya frowned slightly.

This man—

Was no ordinary enemy.

She clenched her fist, her mind already calculating her next move.

But before she could act—

Something moved within the smoke.

Faster than any data could process.

Faster than any human could react.

In the blink of an eye—

He was right in front of her.

And this time—

There was no room to evade.

Even so, Bronya remained calm.

She had already prepared for this scenario.

Adjusting her angle at the last possible moment, she brought the cannon of Project: Bunny directly to his chest.

This attack had been precisely calibrated—a point-blank shot designed to paralyze rather than kill.

A zero-distance electric discharge, amplified to an extreme degree.

"Let's see you avoid this one. Zero Shot! Fire!"

"!!!"