Beautiful Misery

Chapter 3: Mother’s Love



A week later, the father-son pair was allowed to be discharged. However, both of them had to undergo a monthly routine of check-ups as prescribed by their doctor-in-charge. As Jason was paying the medical bills, Jonah was left in the care of the nurses in the nursery room. He was signing the necessary documents when he saw a familiar blue head woman walking to his way.

Jason stood frozen as he numbly looked at her, "Mom?"

She was in her mid 40s and despite her old age, she looked remarkably young and healthy. Jason had inherited her blue hair genetics. Her body figure was petite, standing at 5 ft 4 and her body did not weigh much. Her face was covered with light foundation makeup and her lips painted pink. Her eyelashes were gently curled upwards, revealing her clear aquatic blue eyes. Her rosy-pale skin tone was glossy and her blue hair was long till it went past her shoulders. She was wearing a simple light blue dress with white laces and she wore a pair of white sandals with an iconic "H" cut-out.

Upon seeing her only child, she immediately rushed to him and embraced him tightly, "Thank goodness you're alright!"

Jason, who was in shock, quickly got over it as he pushed his mother lightly and stared at her in disbelief, "What are you doing here? How did you know I was here?"

"What do you mean? The hospital called me, saying you were in critical condition and about to give birth! Why didn't you call me and tell me you were pregnant?! I was worried sick and today happened to be my off day, so I decided to come over to visit you! And where's Kyle?! It's his baby! Why isn't he here?!" His mother asked urgently as she looked around for the man who was supposed to be responsible for her son's well-being.

Hearing the name of his ex-lover coming out of his mother's mouth has made his heart cold. Jason felt his heart twisted in knots upon remembering the past events that had led him to where he was right then. He forced himself not to cry in front of his mother. Instead, he took a deep breath before looking at her with a bitter smile.

"Kyle's no longer around anymore. We decided to split," Jason said slowly.

His mother stopped talking for a moment as she faced to look at him with an unreadable look. Jason was forced to turn away as he felt uncomfortable under his mother's gaze.

'Something must've happened between the two...' Seeing how her son would not talk about it any further from this point, she decided to drop it.

'He'll eventually come around and tell me about it someday.' She thought silently.

She grabbed her son's arm and wrapped her arms around his.

"So where's my grandchild? I can't wait to hold him!" His mother happily chirped and Jason sighed in relief. He was happy she changed the subject without pushing it any further.

"He's in the nursery room, resting—"

"Well, what are we waiting for? Come on. Let's go! I want to see him!" His mother pulled him forward and he complied by walking alongside with her.

As the duo walked, the mother of the pair noticed her son was fidgeting around. When she took his hand, she felt sweat forming underneath his fingers and palm. Jason immediately pulled his hand away, but it was too late.

"What's wrong, honey? Are you okay?" Asked the mother in a worried tone.

Jason was silent for a moment before he looked down and spoke quietly, "... Why didn't you tell me I was a hermaphrodite…?"

His mother frowned, "Now, why would you say that?"

The mother-son pair stopped walking as they faced each other. His mother took the initiative to walk forward and was about to embrace her son warmly in her arms, but it was rejected by Jason who took a step back.

"Jason—"

"Why did you hide this from me? Why didn't you tell me that I was born as a freak and that my life wasn't going to be normal? Those vitamins you gave me when I was younger… was it to suppress the female in me? My gender… was it decided by you or father? Did he allow you to keep me knowing I could be pregnant and married to anyone he wills, even as a guy?!"

As Jason uncontrollably raised his voice, the two soft hands that were known to be gentle, grasped his cheeks harshly in a sounding clap, making him snap out of the spiral he was in. His eyes trained onto his mother who was silently shedding her tears. She quickly pulled him in for an embrace, not allowing Jason to pull back.

"I couldn't deny that I wanted a normal child, but when I first saw you, you were a blessing in disguise. Your father has always wanted an heir and he chose the gender for you. But, that doesn't mean he doesn't love you. He cares about you and you'll always be important to him. So, never think otherwise."

His mother rubbed his back soothingly as she continued. 

"I've been wanting to tell you about it for years— we both did, but we thought as you grow older, your female traits will decline since you didn't have any problems when puberty started and you didn't have to be on pills anymore. Therefore, we didn't tell you… Clearly, we were wrong and I'm sorry, Jason. I'm so sorry. Mom didn't think this through… And… knowing you were able to conceive and give birth, I wouldn't shun you at all, Jason. I'm not that kind of mother. I would've preferred you told me your situation sooner rather than keeping things to yourself... I have always loved you and I will continue to love you, regardless of your gender. You are my child and nothing can ever change that," his mother's voice was soft and filled with sincerity.

Jason trembled as he wrapped his arms around his mother tightly. He had forgotten the feeling of comfort till his mother came. Ever since Kyle left him, no one was there to comfort him. Now that his mother was here, he could finally let go of his burdens.

"I'm sorry for not telling you... Mom... I'm sorry..." he silently sobbed in his mother's embrace as she hushed him silently and rubbed his back.

"Hush now, darling. You did nothing wrong. It was my fault. Mom was in the wrong for hiding this away from you. You deserved to know about it sooner than later and I'm proud of you, Jason. Other people your age would most probably be choosing abortion as an easy-way-out. But, you did not. So, don't cry, my blueberry boy," his mother whispered quietly as she continued to calm him down.

After a while, they stopped hugging. Both mother and son wiped away their tears before taking a deep breath to calm themselves down. Jason looked at his mother with timid eyes as he asked softly, "Mom... D—Father… Does he know…?"

His mother shook her head with a sad smile, "No, since you kept this from me, I'm sure you didn't want him to know as well. As your mother, I respect your wishes. You can tell him whenever you're ready. This is your life after all."

She then placed both of her palms on the sides of her son's cheek and brushed away the remaining tears with her thumbs.

"You have every right to be upset and angry about it. And, you do know you can always talk to me about anything and everything, right?" Jason immediately nodded his head as his mother tiptoed and pecked his left cheek.

After Jason had calmed himself, his mother took the initiative to link their arms together once again, "You don't have to be sad anymore. I'm here now. Come on. Let's go get that baby of yours."

They headed towards the nursery room area and his mother talked along the way to ease the tension. Jason smiled softly as he listened to his mother. The tears had dried and he was smiling warmly.

Upon arriving at the nursery room, one of the nurses who had looked after Jason approached the mother-son pair.

"Hi, Mr Graham! Jonah's asleep now. Would you like to get him now or later?" The nurse asked politely.

His mother who had been standing beside Jason quietly upon arrival, looked up to him with a beaming smile, "Jonah? That's my grandson's name? What a sweet name."

Jason then motioned for the nurse to get Jonah in which the nurse complied. Few moments later, she came back with the bundle secured in her arms. Jason did not take the child from the nurse, instead he let his mother take the initiative for it.

"Careful, mom—"

"I know how to hold a baby, Jason," his mother interrupted. "I still remember how to do it."

His mother interjected him as she was holding the sleeping baby in her arms with the nurse to assist her.

When she could manage on her own, the nurse stepped away and left the family on their own. Jason looked at his mother holding his son. By then, she had tears falling from her lashes and Jason panicked.

"Mom, are you okay? What's wrong?" Asked Jason in a worried tone.

His mother shook her head as she leant down and pecked the baby's forehead before clumsily wiping her tears away with her shoulders.

"He's so tiny... He reminded me so much of you..." his mother whispered-sob quietly.

Feeling that his sleep was disturbed, baby Jonah slowly opened his eyes and wailed aloud. Jason was about to grab ahold of his son when his mother stopped him.

"Hush now, Jonah. Your Grandma is here. Hush, my sweet bean," she whispered-sang quietly and hummed along to a soft tune as gently rocked her arms.

Soon, the baby calmed down but his mother never stopped singing till the end of the note. The baby was then lulled back to sleep once again. His mother looked up with a smile.

"Like father, like son. You liked the song back then too."

Jason did not deny it. He remembered his mother would sing the same song to him whenever he had night-terrors. He missed the song and hearing it once more, brought him good memories he had shared with his young mother.

Afterwards, the mother-son pair headed out of the hospital building with baby Jonah and they took a cab home.


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