Chapter 64: Identity
Eira panted, her body seemed to pulse with exhaustion. Her intense advance took a large toll on her energy. Eira's sword was surrounded by an icy fog, it emitted off her sword and disappeared into the air. She could sense Ali's grey aura slowly stutter and begin to fade. She clenched her sword tightly, she had finally done it. She had killed Ali. Finally, she had put an end to the endless hunger and chaos that sprouted from her deep hate. The hate that initially sprouted from… From…
Why did Eira hate Ali?
As her chest heaved up and down, it was as if the memories had permeated her mind. Every single interaction with Ali played simultaneously. Just as Eira committed the greatest irrational act, rationality was blessed upon her by her precious Mountain Gods.
Eira wasn't the worst affected. Asumi's mouth opened and a blood-curdling scream exited her throat. The clouds covered the moon and complete darkness shrouded upon the village.
"What did you do?!" Asumi's voice flared with outrage unheard by Eira, her voice sharp like knives aimed directly at her. Eira flinched as she felt the words stab at her.
"What did I do…" Eira spoke softly under her breath, no one but herself could hear her. Her eyes darted down at her sword, the light blue in the dim lighting looked like a deep grey. Deep grey. Eira's head twisted quickly to behind her, where Ali's body lay, the process of deteriorating was slow but gradual. His head was further away, his eyes had rolled back and he was silent.
Eira was yanked forward, Asumi's hands violently pulled on Eira's shoulders. Asumi's eyes were a dangerous mix of wrath and sorrow. Tears mixed with small pupils that indicated hate.
"We had a deal!" Asumi's grip on Eira's shoulder tightened as she continued to spurt out words of anger. Eira's heart ached as she suffered the toll of her actions now. The intense hate had seemed to disappear, where did it go? She knew she had it, she had felt it just a day, an hour, a minute ago.
"Eira! I…" Asumi's grip ever so slightly loosened. Her hands slipped off as she fell to her knees and burst in sorrow on the ground, her hands quivered as she went to reach for Ali's flower. In both her hands she held both flowers. For the first time, they were browning, their petals looked dull and dying. A symbol of Ali's fleeting life. Asumi dropped the flowers and got back onto her feet, tears still fell from her eyes. She gasped for air as she struggled silently. All Eira could do was stay paralysed in regret. Her mind knew she had hurt her best friend… Her best friend Ali or her best friend Asumi? No. Both.
Asumi's pink aura wasn't pink anymore, the red outline had consumed all of her. She was buried in guilt and sorrow. Asumi's back turned to Eira and Ali as she stumbled to the pink sword that lay on the ground desolate and lonely. Asumi couldn't bear the intensity, she didn't even want to see Ali as he crumbled into dust, if she did, she'd die of heartbreak.
Eira's skin crawled with goosebumps and shivered as she felt a certain aura. Calm purple.
"What happened here?.." Kaze's voice sent Eira into a state of terrible chaos. The one person who seemed to… believe in her.
Kaze's eyes scanned the area and quickly concluded. His eyes slowly met Eira's, he saw the vulnerability in her eyes, he saw the guilt that overflowed her heart. Eira saw disappointment in his eyes, Kaze broke eye contact and looked at Asumi.
"Asumi…" Kaze sighed, "I'm so sorry…"
Eira was still. Alone. Regretful. The boil of hate had now cooled down, no, it had disappeared too suddenly in a weird manner. The voice in her head that constantly screamed for Ali's demise had gone too quiet as if it found enjoyment in Eira's silent realisation. She stared at her sword, grey, and quiet as if it wasn't screaming in excitement when it tore through Ali's neck.
Grey. The grey aura slowly faded.
Ali's arms were fully deteriorated, his head was in a slower process, the right side of his face slowly crumbled.
Ali's soul was elsewhere. He opened his eyes, his back was on a wet surface. No, his backside was completely submerged in water, he stood up. A strange dimension, dim yet well-lit, the water he stood in was shallow yet deep, wet yet not wet. The whole area was a paradox. Was this the afterlife?
He was alive… yet… dead.
As he turned his body, he saw a wooden raft. It floated alone. Ali's curiosity took the better of him and his feet treaded the shallow yet deep, wet yet dry water. The raft was well-developed, almost resembling a proper boat. As he looked inside, his heart dropped. Two skeletons. Ali's eyes widened and he stumbled backwards, his hands stretched backwards as he fell. His heart thumped loudly.
Just as he exhaled, a loud cry came from the boat, a cry of a baby. Ali picked himself up again and in the boat with the two skeletons gone, there was a small baby who cried. An infant, bundled up a brown cloth. It cried.
"Who's baby is this?" Ali asked the important things. His hands stretched out and picked up the infant. He held the infant in his arms and it stopped crying. The paradoxical dimension seemed to have a soft hum of ambience in the background. Ali felt somewhat connected to this baby. Was this death? A crying infant who led you to the afterlife?
Suddenly, Ali's leg was pinched, to which he turned around quickly. A toddler behind him. His legs wobbled as he walked away, or attempted to. As if he was taking his first steps, slow and steady.
"Wait-!" Ali yelped out as the toddler was close to falling forward, now Ali had an infant in one arm and a toddler in another. His eyes stared at the toddler's features.
"Wait…" Ali's eyes examined the toddler. As if there couldn't be a single moment of peace, another distraction hit Ali.
"Bang!" A small fist punched at Ali's back, he turned around and to his not-so-much surprise. It was a child. Almost immediately, Ali recognised the child.
"You're… me," Ali spoke softly to the child as he continued to punch the air. There was no mistake, the brown skin and the wavy dark hair. It was Ali.
Every time Ali turned around, there was a new 'Ali' of a different age. The paradox-filled dimension came with the biggest reality. Life. Ali's heart thumped as his eyes stared around. His mind struggled to comprehend. What was this? Where was he?
"What the…" Ali sighed.
"What the." The toddler in Ali's arm repeated, Ali looked at the toddler and seemed to smile.
"Don't say that," Ali laughed as he looked around. There were now eight or so iterations of him, all doing their own individual thing. The oldest must've been ten years old or so, a wooden sword in his hands. Ali put the toddler down and put a hand to his eyes. The afterlife was weird. A pounding sense of confusion only grew, yet he felt so… lucid and clear.
"I'm Ali," A voice spoke, as the 'real' Ali removed his hand from his face. The infant in his arms had seemed to disappear, now held by a different Ali.
Perplexity restricted Ali from question. What does that sentence even mean?
Ali's eyes tracked to where the voice came from. A thirteen-year-old-looking Ali spoke to a five-year-old Ali.
"No… way… I'm Ali!" The five-year-old jumped in excitement, the very premise of someone having the same name only now coming to his child's brain.
The 'real' Ali laughed as he witnessed this interaction, soon, the entire gang of 'Ali's were talking about how they were all Ali.
"I'm Ali too!"
"Me too!"
A familiar face graced Ali's eyes, familiar as in recent. The 'Ali before he became a demon'. The oldest.
"We're all Ali, let's calm down now," The human Al laughed and everyone seemed to huddle in a circle, chattering. The 'real' and current Ali stood outside of the circle. Exclusion came with sorrow and a sense of hopelessness.
Ali sighed as he stared at them, all human. He stared at his blue skin and the dark blue crescents. He wasn't human.
"Hey!" A voice called out to Ali from the group, "Who or what are you? Are you Ali?"
All eyes stared at Ali, a mounting pressure placed on Ali's shoulders. The water seemed to grow deeper, his feet slowly sank as if he stepped in quicksand. His heart pounded, his voice didn't seem to work. No matter how hard he tried to say "I'm not Ali. I'm a demon", the words didn't escape his mouth. He sank further and further. This was death. Ali couldn't feel his lower body that had sunk below, it felt... empty.
He closed his eyes, and his heart slowly pulsed. Life flashed before his eyes, or certain memories did. Some of them involved Asumi, the times he was happiest. Some were training with Sanemi. Some of them were laughing with Eira and Asumi. Some of them were alone, when he stared at nature or the sky. Some with Ali Junior, a crow that became so relevant in his life.
Ali took a deep breath as the essence of death slowly circled around his soul. He couldn't help but tear up and smile. He had lived a good life. His eyes opened, he had sunk up to his neck, all eyes still on him. Every Ali looked at the 'real' Ali, sinking into death.
"I'm Ali." These words came out of Ali's words naturally as breathing in stark contrast to the other statement he had tired. As death gripped him, he had resolved it. With the help of all his mentors, friends and most importantly. The sweet words "You're still the same Ali I love" spoken by Asumi, his lover. He knew who he was in the moments of death, he knew what he was.
"I'm a demon, but… I'm Ali," Ali smiled.
He was ready to die.
The paradoxical dimension seemed to erupt with brightness. All the Alis huddled around the sinking Ali, they grabbed him by the head and began to pull.
"Ow! What are you doing?!" Ali shouted in agony, his neck felt the tough yank and he immediately clenched his jaw. The water gave a tough resistance, they couldn't pull him out.
"We can't let another Ali die can we?" The oldest, pre-demon-incident Ali spoke with a grin. "So what if you're a demon? We're all Ali,"
The 'real' Ali seemed to forget the pain for a moment. He smiled once again.
"Alright, get me up." He laughed. As he laughed, the water seemed to loosen its resistance and Ali's body slipped out of the sinking state. Every hand on him had one intention. Stay alive.
"Fly!" A child Ali shouted as they finally heaved Ali out, Ali didn't stand or fall onto the shallow yet deep, wet yet dry water. He continued to float upward.
"See you later, Ali!" They all said in unison.
The 'real' Ali couldn't help but tear up as the group became smaller, he continued to float upwards.
"I am Ali. I used to be human, but now I'm a demon. I guess I miss being a human but… I'm still me, a demon, but I'm me. I know I won't ever be human again. But… that's ok because I'm me. And you know… I love me, I just happen to be a demon. I can regenerate my arms if they're cut off, I can't step into sunlight and I have blue skin. I am Ali, I love Ali, whether he's a demon, human or horse." Ali closed his eyes and finally came to terms with his identity. He knew who we was. After intense crisis and struggle of identity. After the intense and unrealistic desire to become human again, he finally accepted he was a demon.
Ali reached the top of the paradox dimension and escaped. He was alive… yet… alive.
As Eira stood still, Asumi sulked intensely and Kaze walked to Asumi to comfort her. Ali's body stopped the process of deterioration.
The rolled-back eyes on his head focused once again, Lower Moon One, Ali was alive.